






Matt Shaw


The 8th






PROLOGUE

Just like every other day I was the last one into the classroom. It wasnt because I was late. Most days I was early as I opted to get the earlier bus to avoid the crowds and my fellow classmates. It was just easier that way  with regards to getting the earlier bus and being one of the last into the classroom.

With my heart pounding hard in my chest I stepped into the classroom just behind Mrs Price, the teacher, who paid me little attention as she briskly walked across to her desk, in her tight-fitting black pencil skirt and white blouse, in front of the pupils. I closed the door and pulled the window-blind down to stop people from being able to look in. This was something I didnt usually do. Normally I was happy for other teachers to poke their noses in  to make sure we were behaving while our teacher had her back to us as she scribbled on the blackboard. Today, though, I dont welcome their attention.

By the time I turned away from the heavy oak door Mrs Price was staring at me with a look of contempt on her face; an expression she regularly adopted whilst looking at me through no fault of my own. Im almost positive shes fairly pretty, with her curly shoulder length blonde hair, big blue eyes and full lips painted heavily in a seductive red lipstickIts had to be sure whether she is actually pretty or notunder that stern expression. It was fair to say she was one of the stricter teachers. I didnt move. Part of me wanted to go and take my usual seat in the front row of the classroom; as far away from Piers and his friends as I could possibly get without sitting in the teachers lap. The other part of me wanted to carry on as I had planned.

Mrs Price folded her arms. You knew she was angry when she did this. First came the deathly stare which could penetrate the most hardened of souls and then came the folding of the arms. Next up shell speak in a tone which would send most sane men running for the hills for fear of spontaneously combusting at the sound of her voice. I pity her husband. After a few warning words, which were normally laced with sarcasm, shed suddenly flip a switch and start shouting.

A quick scan of my fellow classmates showed they were all looking at me. Some of them looked worried for me and others just sat there with a sadistic look of glee upon their faces as they waited to enjoy the floor show Mrs Price and I were about to put on for them. All of them were thankful they werent standing in my shoes at this precise moment. Im starting to wish I had waited for my second class of the day to do this. Mr Smart was a much friendlier teacher.

Oh, Im sorry, I wasnt aware you were teaching the class today, said Mrs Price with just about the right level of sarcasm I was expecting. A few quiet sniggers from around the classroom. I didnt say anything. I just stood there, blocking the doorway whilst wondering whether this was the right thing to do. Had I really planned it through? Its too late now. Theres no turning back. With my left hand shaking I reached into my rucksack, which was one-strapped over my right shoulder. I froze. I could feel it in my hand but part of me was still screaming that this wasnt the right thing to do; screaming there were better ways of dealing with things

Shut up! I whispered under my breath to the part of me which was scared. I knew this was the right thing to do. It had been building for far too long. They had it coming. They all did. Everything that was to follow, when I pulled my hand from the rucksack, is deserved and I refuse to let the scared part of me, the quiet side of my personality, ruin the enjoyment Im going to get.

What did you say? said Mrs Price; a tone of voice I had never heard before. Neither had the rest of the class. A quick scan of my classmates showed they had all sunk back, ever so slightly, in their uncomfortable grey plastic chairs. The ones who previously had gleeful smiles upon their faces were now sat expressionless so as not to attract the attention of Mrs Price. Their faces were white as they feared what they were about to witness. They have no idea. Today, its not Mrs Price they need to fear.

Its me.

I pulled my hand from my rucksack, my fathers 9mm Glock, gripped firmly in my palm with my index finger on the trigger and my other fingers around the handle. Everyone screamed, even Mrs Price. Need to control them. Need to silence them. Dont want to attract any unwanted attention. I dont need this to be any worse than I already have planned.

I said shut up! I hissed. I pointed the gun at Mrs Price first. She fell backwards onto the floor. I couldnt help but smile a little. All those years of her shouting the odds at us. All those years of her believing she was untouchable. It was nice to see her fall. I span the gun around to point at my classmates. Some of whom were cowering behind their hands, as though they had the power to stop a bullet should I choose to fire, whilst others were trying to get under their desks. The sadistic part of me was surprised no one tried to make a dash for me. No one tried to wrestle the gun away from me. No one tried to control the situation. Im glad. I dont want the sound of gunfire. Not yet. That would have ruined everything I have planned. The fact theyre all petrified. It should make controlling them that much easier



1

It was weird seeing Mrs Price sitting in the front row, amongst the pupils who despised her so much. Not just because I was used to seeing her at the front of the class berating someone butHer expressionTears in her eyes, a pale complexionShakingShes shaking. Ive never seen that before. Not from a woman who presents herself as being so domineering. Speaking of domineering I had often heard Piers talking to his little gang, discussing whether Mrs Price would look good in skin-tight latex with a whip in her hand. The majority of the group said she would. Some of them even admitted to masturbating to the thought of her like thatOne of the group said the bulge of her penis would ruin the overall look. Seeing her, sat here nowTheres nothing manly about her. Theres nothing domineering. Shes a nothing. Maybe I should get her to stand up and prove to Piers and his gang that she doesnt have a cock hidden under her black pencil skirt. No. Thats not fair. This isnt about belittling her despite what she puts us through on a day to day basis. At the end of the day she is just being strict to keep us in control. Outside of the school shes probably a human. Deep down. Somewhere.

What are you doing? she asked in a meek voice. I have to confess, she surprised me. Most of the time there was a little masculinity in her voice but not now. Now she sounded like a scared little girl. Had you not seen who it was speaking you could have been forgiven for thinking it was one of the schools many female pupils talking.

I didnt answer her. Instead I reached across to her pile of folders, which she had placed on the desk when she first came into the room, and picked up the one labelled as registration. I flicked it open to the first page; a list of names of the boys and girls who should be sat in front of me for this lesson.

When I call out your name, I said, please say here. One by one I called out the various names from the list in front of me, not that I needed a list. I knew their names; my classmates. The people who had tormented me day in and day out for the past two years whether it was by name-calling or physical abuse. I wont ever forget their names. And after today, people wont forget my name either. Minutes later and the roll-call was done. No-one was absent for a change. Good. Id have hated for them to miss this.

I put the folder down and cast my eyes around the class. Its unfortunate some of them are here and have to witness this. In a class of twenty-five there are some who are like me. They dont deserve to be here. They dont deserve whats coming. I dont have a choice but to include them, though. If I let them go, theyll no doubt inform someone what is happening in here. If I were in their shoes I know Id go and get help if I was let out. My gaze fixed upon Rebecca Clarke who was sitting in the middle of the classroom, towards one of the walls. Rebecca was one of the louder girls in the class. She was more centered upon sleeping with as many of the boys as she could as opposed to soaking useful information. If the rumors are to be believed, and I have no reason to doubt them, shes swallowed more cum than Ive had hot meals. Of course she doesnt struggle to attract the boys attention looking the way she does; long dark hair down to her petite waist and large breasts enhanced further by a tight-fitting school shirt. Unlike a lot of the other girls who chose to wear trousers, she always opted for the skirt. She even took the time, in lunch-breaks, to roll it up a little to show off more leg. Sometimes she rolls it up so much you cant help but think of it as nothing more than a belt. Pregnant by eighteen, I reckon.

Rebecca had her mobile phone in her hand and was frantically pressing buttons. I picked the handgun off the table and pointed it directly at her, looking down the aiming sights. Its a little scary how easy it is to end her little life right about now. A simple squeeze of my trigger finger and her brains will be all over David Barlow who was sitting behind her. Poor David. Hes one of the good ones. Whenever I wasnt feeling sorry for myself, Id be feeling sorry for him. Unlike Rebecca, we both at least tried hard in class. We just struggled to get it most of the time. Our stupidity was a great source of entertainment to the other classmates  some of whom were just as baffled as David and I by what we were being taught. The only difference was, they simply didnt care.

Rebecca, I said. My voice was calm. No sense shouting. Theres no need. Not all the time I have a gun. Rebecca looked up and froze when she realised she was staring down the barrel of a 9mm pistol, be a good girl and pass your mobile phone to me

I wasnt doing anything she tried to tell me. How stupid does she think I am? Well, soon shell realise Im someone to be reckoned with. She realised her words were of no use and slowly stood up. Please dont shoot she whimpered. She looks scared but its hard to feel sorry for her. Every time I look at her I just remember that night; her hand on my leg, her breath against my ear, the words she whispered, the glint in her eye as she gave my crotch a squeeze

I said give me your phone.

She walked up to the front of the class and put her phone on the teachers desk where I was sat. I didnt take my eyes off her. That night, the rare occasion I was actually invited to one of the many school parties, she thought it was a good idea to pretend to want me. Whispering sweet nothings into my ear she told me how she had always wanted to make love to me but was too scared to make a move. Part of me knew she was just winding me up but another part of me, the lonely part, wanted to believe her. I was stupid. Rebecca isnt the sort of girl who enjoys making love. She just wants to fuck people. Trying to be clever, she got me aroused as Piers and his gang waited outside with their mobile phones at the ready

Is that everything? she asked, her quivering voice pulled me back to the present. I shook my head. No, thats not everything. You can see, I didnt send any messages I pushed back on the chair to put some distance between myself and the table  enough of a gap to allow her through.

Get under the table, I said.

What?

Rebeccas punishment was easy to think of. Ever since that night its all I have really thought about. Forcing her to do what she teased. Nows a good a time as any. Get under the table, I said.

No

I stood up and walked over to her with the gun still raised. I pressed it against her skull and she made a funny whimpering noise. She sounded a little like a dog crying when you stand on its tail. I saidGetUnderTheTable

She nodded and stepped round me to get to the space under the table. As soon as she was under there I sat down on the chair again, and rolled myself closer to the desk. Underneath the table I had a leg either side of Rebecca. I could hear her crying but it didnt bother me.

PleaseThis has gone far enough said Mrs Price. I shot her a glare. I havent started yet. She fell silent.

With my spare hand I unzipped my trousers, out of sight of the rest of the class although they knew what I was doing, and pulled my penis out. Semi hard already. Not sure whether thats because of the control I have over everyone or because of what Im about to get from Rebecca.

Did you know, I said to Mrs Price, I went to a party once and Rebecca was there. She was telling me how much she liked me and had always wanted to make love to me. She was being so kind. Id never felt that from someone beforeKindness to that extent. A feeling of worth, you know. She was saying all sorts of nice things. She was touching me. Kissing me. Stroking me through my trousers. I honestly thought all my birthdays had come at once when she started to unbutton me I could hear Rebecca crying from underneath the table saying how sorry she was but I didnt care, The next thing I know Piers and his little friends burst in on usLaughingPointing their camera phones at meSome of them videoingI was just sat there exposed in more ways than oneI dont know how many people saw that videoThe video they were even kind enough to email over to meYou know, that night when I got homeI tied a noose round my neck and sat on the edge of my bed thinking it was the best thing to doHang myselfOnly the thought of my mum and dad finding me swinging in the morning stopped me from actually doing it. You know how it feels to feel that lowLike you cant go on living?

Think of your mum and dad now, said Mrs Price.

I shook my head. Ill never be the son they want. I know that now. They want someone academically bright. They want someone who can make something of their lives. That isnt me. Im a nothing. Im a nobody. If it werent for whats to come today  no one would remember me when Im gone. No oneRebeccaput it in your mouth. If I feel teethIll shoot your friends.

This isnt the way, said Mrs Price, we can suspend them all whilst we look into thisWe can

RebeccaWhat are you waiting for? I said interrupting Mrs Price from her desperate flow. A thousand jolts of electricity shot through my body as I felt Rebeccas fingers brush against my hardening penis. Just as good as I had always imagined. I couldnt help but close my eyes for the briefest of seconds as I felt her warm mouth envelope my shaft, sliding down to the base. Feels so fucking good. I knew it would. Slightly flustered, I addressed the rest of the class, One by one, I want you all to bring your mobile phones to the deskStarting with you I pointed the gun in the direction of Craig Clemo, a dark haired lad with big brown eyes who sat on the far right of the classroom, against the wall. I didnt mind Craig. Hes a bit of a nothing like me. When the bullies are out in force he just keeps his head down and doesnt get involved. I sometimes wonder how different my school days would have been if I had chosen his coping mechanisms too. Had I not stood up for David Barlow when Piers was picking on him would Piers ever have known of my existence or could I have just ghosted my way through his life?

Craig stood up and brought his phone to the front of the class. He put it on the desk and walked back to his seat.

You, I said pointing the gun to Rachel, who sat behind him. She too stood up and dropped her phone onto the desk. When she sat down the next person brought their phone forward too without having to be asked. I smiled and sat back. Whilst theyre doing that it affords me the time to enjoy what Rebecca is doing. A flicking sensation on the tip of my penis, with what feels to be her tongue. A gentle tickling around my scrotum. All those years of practicing have most certainly paid off for her. I couldnt help but sigh as her mouth slipped down the shaft once more before sliding back up. Faster..FasterSlower. Teasing. But nicely so. I wonder if the other girls in the class are as good as this. My eyes fix upon Mrs Price. I wonder if shes as good

A tingling sensation, not dissimilar to pins and needles, spreads through the tops of my legs. The pleasurable, familiar feeling of an orgasm about to hit. I tried my best not to show it in my face as I continued staring at Mrs Price, wondering what it would be like to fuck her. I moved my spare hand under the table and held Rebeccas head in place. Just in time too. She tried to pull away from me as I ejaculated into her mouth. Hold her there. Listen how she chokes it down. Good girl. I released my grip on the back of her head and let her move away. I can hear that shes crying. Was it really that bad?

A feeling of guilt rushed through me as I suddenly became aware of everyone looking at me. Watching my every move. Watching me cum. I pushed my cock, coated in Rebeccas saliva, back into my trousers and zipped myself up. What have I done? What have I become? I dont recognise myself anymore.



2

Another new school to find my way around. I love my dad but I dont love what he does for a living. Constantly moving house and taking mum and I with him, leaving behind friends Ive only just metHaving to start again from scratch. Catching up in classes I already struggle with because theyve chosen different books to study from the last school I attended. I hate being the outsider. The one who cant find any friendly faces amongst the crowds. Its always the same. Go to school. Get lost looking for class. Arrive at class late, or with a teacher escort  which is far worseStand in front of the room and introduce yourself. Explain why youre new to the town. Sit in the only spare seat, in the front of the classroom, and feel the gaze of every pupil fix upon you for the rest of whatever lesson it is, awkwardly share books with someone whod rather you had your ownA pile of homework to catch up on; mainly reading assignments you know youll never be able to complete. Yes, I love my dad but I hate that we have to move around so much.

Have a good day, honey, my mum called out. I turned back to her, when I got to the school gates, and saw her waving frantically. I should wave back but its embarrassing enough that she just called me honey in earshot of other people who may or may not be in my classroom. I gave her a faint smile and turned towards the school. Here we go again.

The first days are always the worst. At least by the end of the first day you have normally made one friend; someone to look out for on the second and third day whilst you establish new friendships. As I scanned the various faces in the crowd walking with me to the front door, I wondered whether any of them were likely to be my new friends. I have to sayOn first impressions none of them look to be that friendly! Not even through the front door yet and I feel uncomfortable. Not the best of starts I think to myself as I hear the random mutterings of small groups that I pass all wondering who the new kid is and how weird I look.

How they can say I look weird is beyond me. Across the car park, in the corner, I saw a group all dressed in black. Even the boys had make-up on from what I could see. Another group, in the same car park, all wore matching clothes with their hair styled in various multi-coloured spikesAnd here I am dressed in faded blue jeans, a black hooded top with the hood down and newish white trainers  which, admittedly, are a little on the bright side but I expect thatll change after a couple of days schooling here. My hair is the natural brown colour I was born with, Im clean shaven. My eyes are the same dark brown colour as each other, unlike the girl I just walked by who seemed to have one blue eye and one greenYet people are saying Im the weird one. If anything, I reckon Ill blend in here. Unless, of course, I decide to take refuge in the car park at any moment. Definitely a place to avoid going to by what Ive seen.

I pushed the large double doors open and stepped inside my new place of supposed learning. The familiar smell of school hit me as soon as I stepped over the threshold. I dont know what it is about schools which make them all have the same old musty scent. Perhaps its the old text-books were to work from? Perhaps its those which smell of old-age and death and you just notice it more because theres so many littered around the building. Perhaps.

The corridor in front of me stretched as far as the eye could see. The walls were lined with tall wooden lockers with occasional gaps between the lockers where the doors were to the various classrooms. Whats the betting this is like all the other schools Ive been to and the classrooms arent in any particular order despite being known, on the timetable, as class one, class two etc etc? The last school I was in, a few towns away from where I am todayThe first door I came across was labelled number twenty-four. Days later I found number one stuck in a different wing entirely and even then it wasnt by the main entrance. Instead it was tucked away on the top floor next to room sixty-five. The first time I noticed this, I cant even remember what school it was, I thought it was because some bored student had simply gone around swapping door plaques around to confuse people. With all the different schools Ive been toI know this isnt the case. Not unless the person responsible is in the same boat as me and doing it in every school he, or she, is visiting. I doubt it, though.

I stepped to the side of the corridor, to get out of the way of the never-ending sea of students, and reached into my pocket to find my timetable; a small piece of paper with my lessons and classrooms printed upon it which the school posted out to my house about a week ago.

You new? Looking for somewhere in particular? asked a quiet male voice from behind me. I turned around and saw a lad of similar age to myself. A mousey-blonde colour to his hair and freckles on his face. A cheeky smile with massive dimples on his cheeks. I couldnt help but wonder whether it was a smile to be trusted or a smile because he was about to send me in the completely wrong direction just because he could.

Is that obvious? I asked.

Well for starters youre wearing your rucksack over both shoulders. No one does that in this school unless theyre new. And secondly, youre looking at your timetable with a look of confusion on your face. You knowPutting two and two together he laughed. Where you headed?

I checked my timetable, English with Mrs Jones, I said.

He smiled wider. Snap! You may as well follow me, he volunteered. I thanked him and slipped the timetable back into my pocket. Whats your name? he asked after informing me his name was David.


David was looking at me, from his seat just behind Rebeccas, with a look in his eyes which suggested he had no idea who I was. As I listened to Rebeccas sobs as she took her seat, I couldnt help but wonder who I was too. Im not this person. Im not. Im a good person. Normally. Im like my friend David. Im one of the good ones. Who I am todayThis isnt me, usually. Its not. They made me. They turned me into this. Sadistic. Hateful. Vengeful. This is their fault.

I looked around the rest of the classroom. Theyre all looking at me with the same look as David. Mrs Price is looking at Rebecca. I can see, in her eyes, that she desperately wants to go and comfort her. She suddenly turned to look at me, as though she could feel my glare burning into the side of her pretty face. I dont recognise the expression in her eyes. Its as though shes asking, what have you done? without actually speaking the words. I forgot how much I hated myself, right now, to answer her with a look of my own. I look which told her  I did what she deserved and that was only the beginning.

I stood up, behind the teachers desk, to address the class. I feel as though I should say something. Whilst I am sure some of them know why I am here, Im positive some of them dont have a clue. After all, some of my classmatesIve hardly spoken to them and, in turn, theyve hardly spoken to me. Its only fair, given the circumstances, I give them a chance to understand what Im doing here. And its only fair to let them know, theyll come to no harm.

If I call your name, Id like you to stand up pleaseDavid Barlow the class went silent, Lindsey West One by one, when I called out the names, they stood up just as I had requested them to. Each of them looked just as nervous as the one who was called out before. They have nothing to be nervous about. Seven names in total  David, Lindsey, Elizabeth, Marcus, Samantha, Kate, Helen. Funny how its mainly girls names Im calling out. I guess its more in boys nature to be cruel to one another. Not for much longer. Not by the time Im done. And word of whats to come will soon spread around the town too; a harsh warning to others who may be making similar mistakes as made by Piers and his little friends.

I looked around the classroom at the pupils still sat down. One of them was Craig Clemo. I considered calling his name out too butI recall him being involved in one of the incidents where I was under fire. He kept his head down. He didnt offer help or anything. Not even when the group left me alone and I was nursing a bloodied nose. He didnt ask if I was okay. He didnt offer to get help. Nothing. Just stood there watching me. He can stay sat down.

If youre currently standing upIm sorry youre here. Had there been any other way, I would have taken it I can assure you. I dont want to hurt you. Youve done nothing wrong to me or, as far as I know, anyone else. If youd like to come forwardYou can bring your chairsYou can sit to the side, near me; out of harms way There was the briefest of pauses before each of the seven came to the front of the class as I had requested. The rest of the class just looked nervous and confused. I know you wont butShould any of you attempt anything funnyYoull have to join the rest of your classmates. Understood?

They nodded. David looked as though he desperately wanted to say something but no words came from his quivering mouth.

Mrs Price asked, What about me? What have I done?

I shot her a look, Its what you didnt do I know I originally thought this wasnt about her but Mrs Price is just as bad as some of the students who sit in front of me. The way she berated some of us, in front of the whole class, did nothing for self-esteem and embarrassed us. The more I see her, sitting thereThe more I see her as another form of bully.



3

David led the way to my first classroom. I have to say, it was a nice stroke of luck meeting him. I hate meeting new people; I always feel awkwardNever sure what to say to potential new friends. Normally I just hang around a large group and occasionally laugh at a joke one of them may say. Then, hopefully, one of them will start to include me in their conversations too. Of course, it doesnt always work like that. Sometimes you can just sit there and be completely ignored. Thats never fun. It makes you feel worthless and insignificant. It was definitely a stroke of luck bumping into David now. I only but hope we share more than one class together.

Here we are, said David. He stopped outside a classroom door. You might not want to go in with me, he said.

Okay, I wasnt expecting that. Dont want to be seen with the new guy, huh? He didnt answer, just looked away with a sheepish expression on his face  the once cheeky smile now faded. I cant believe he actually looked worried about being seen with me. I know no one really likes to be seen with the new kid on the block but this was the most extreme Ive seen it. Fine, whatever.

I pushed past him and walked through the busy sounding classroom. The room, full of my new classmates, went quiet as soon as they saw me. I wont lie, its not the most comfortable of welcomes. I felt like a stranger stumbling through a small town for the first timeA town where they arent used to seeing a new face. They arent used to it and nor do they welcome it.

Hi, I said. Unsurprisingly no one answered. I turned back to the door hoping to see Davids once friendly face. He wasnt there. WellBy myself then. Okay then I muttered, more or less to myself, as I walked over to one of the spare seats at the front of the classroom. I always prefer sitting at the front of the class. I learned long ago that the teacher picks on you more if you choose to sit towards the back of the room as they think youre not paying any attention to what theyre trying to teach you. Im sure this teacher will be no different.

I started to root around in my rucksack. I wasnt looking for anything in particular; simply trying to distract myself from the whisperings coming from behind me. Little voices enquiring who I was and what I was doing hereOne voice explaining how bent I looked. A friendly bunch then. In times like these, as sadly its not the first time Ive experienced this, I just have to keep telling myself that everything is going to be okay and they just need the chance to get to know me a little better. Day one is always awkward. By day two  youre yesterdays news. Just need to make it through to tomorrow.

Faggot! shouted a voice from behind me. I turned away from my rucksack and looked in the direction of the voice. One thing to whisper behind my back, its another thing altogether to start name calling meThe insult came from a lad in the back of the class. Of course it was the back. A scruffy, stocky lad with messy blonde hair. He wasnt looking at me, though. Was the insult even meant for me? I followed his gaze to where David was stood in the doorway of the classroom. David looked anxious. Is this why he didnt want to come in with me? Worried the lads would pick on me because I was with him? Makes sense. I did think it was weird how he went from being so friendly to so cold. I was starting to think you werent coming in today, said the boy at the back of the class.

Just took him longer to wank off Mr Fitzpatrick this morning said a lad to the left of the one who started the insults. Laughter rippled through the classroom from most of the students. David didnt laugh. He simply walked over to an empty chair behind a pretty girl who was also laughing at him.

Fuck, said the first lad, why are you such a fucking faggot? Your mum and dad must be gutted to have you as a son. Oh wait, your mums dead isnt she? Surprised I forgot that. After all, it was only last night I was skull fucking her corpseStillYour dad isnt dead. Probably just wishes he was. I reckon hes sat at home now wondering why his son is such a bender

Maybe hes using you as his role model, I said. I couldnt help but speak up. David was visibly upset and this was obviously a daily occurrence. No sooner had the words escaped my mouth then the class fell silent. The lad looked at me; a look of hatred in his blue eyes.

Fuck you say?

Well I too was wondering how hes as gay as he isThe way he so expertly sucks cocksThe only way I can see someone his age, being so great at swallowing spunk, is if he had a role model. I look around here and the only possibility is you and your bum-chum friends.

Who the fuck are you anyway?

You dont recognise me? Im the one who was fucking your mother late last nightCould have sworn I saw you hiding in the cupboard tugging yourself off at the sight of my fine ass and your mums pert breasts.

The lad stood up and started to walk over to me. I think its fair to say were never likely to be friends even though most of the other classmates were finding me hysterical.

Take your seats! shouted a female voice from the front of the classroom. I looked around and saw a pretty female teacher. I think its fair to say she couldnt have timed that better if she had tried.

I turned my back on the lad. He wasnt going to try anything with the teacher there. Who knows, maybe hell have a chance to calm down during this lesson? Dont really care either way. Bullies like himTheyre all talk. Ive met his kind before. I shot David a quick look and smiled at him. He wasnt smiling back. He almost looked apologetic.


I recalled seeing that expression on Davids face the first day when I had stood up for him. He looked sorry for thinking he had got me involved in his troubles. I want to tell him this isnt his fault. I want to tell him that they had brought it upon themselves. I want to tell him but I dont. I turned back to the rest of the class. They all look worried. No doubt theyre wishing I had called their names out too. Give them a way out. Looking around at the remaining classmates, I didnt realise there were so many who had wronged me. I cant help but think it would have been better picking a double lesson to do this. Where to start? Where to start? Given the fact I might not get to everyoneOnly one place to start really


As another fist connected to my already bloodied nose, I couldnt help but think  through the intense pain flowing through my body  day two was already worse than day one.

I dropped to my knees, on the bathroom floor, and tried to focus my vision. I could hear David screaming from the far side of the room as he was receiving the same treatment. My blurred vision snapped back to the best focus it was able toJust in time to see Piers, the lad who I had had a run in on day one, spit at me.

Not such a smart-arse now are you?

I wish I could come back with a witty retort but my brain is telling me Ive taken enough of a beating for today. Another fist to the face floored me. I didnt move. I just laid there on the tiled floor, near the puddles of piss by the urinal, wishing for it to end. At least I think thats what I am thinking about. So many thoughts buzzing through my brain that its hard to make sense of many of them. Another fist flew towards my face in a blurred motion. This will hurt

By the time I could hear my thoughts clear enough to make sense of them, they were being drowned out by the sound of Davids voice. He was crying. My eyes focused on my surroundings. Still on the toilet floor, the stench of stale urine filling one of my nostrils. My other nostril blocked with blood. Every part of me aches.

Im sorry, said David again. He helped me to my feet. He looked just as battered as I did although, I think its fair to say, I took the brunt of it. Probably deserved after sticking up for him yesterday.

Youve got nothing to be sorry for, I said. Even my voice sounded broken. Besides, I lied, I quite enjoyed that. Not sure why I do that, trying to put a brave face on and all that. Not the first time Ive used that as a defense mechanism for when Im in agonising pain.

If you hadnt stuck up for me yesterday, he started to say

I wouldnt have been much of a friend, I interrupted. Even had I known the beating I was to endure, I still would have spoken up yesterday. I hate bullies. Theyre nothing more than cowards hiding behind their little friends. Normally picking on the weaker people just to try and make themselves feel better about their own miserable lives. Fuck them. We both looked at ourselves in the mirror. Remember I said, The first rule of Fight Club isDont talk about Fight Club. David laughed and suddenly grabbed his jaw as a bolt of pain shot through him.

Surely Day Three will be easier.



4

I think Id make a good teacher. I believe I have the voice for it. The right amount of authority in my tone.

Piers, I said, using my teachers tone, step forward. If time is lacking, for my lesson, Id best start with the main culprit. The one who has constantly been nasty. Seeing what I do to himThat might just be enough for the others to learn by, if I dont have the time to get to them. Piers didnt move from his seat; his usual place in the back of the classroom. Was he really going to make me repeat myself? Im sorry, I continued, maybe you didnt hear me all the way back there. I turned to Mrs Price, Do you often struggle with students at the back not hearing you properly? She didnt answer either. Cant help but think thats a little rude. It was a civil enough question, I feel. Ill come back to her later. I turned my attention back to Piers. Just looking at his face makes me feel sick. Memories of what hes put me through. Im sure David must feel the same too. Piers, dont make me ask again.

Fuck you, he spat from the area he foolishly perceived as being safe at the back of the room. Little boy obviously doesnt appreciate how far bullets can fly. The rest of the class, especially those who sat in close proximity, werent as foolish as a clear gap appeared between me and Piers. I took the gun up from where it rested, close to me, on the table and pointed it directly at Piers. You wont shoot me, he said. Damn, hes clever. Shooting him will be too easy.

Youre right, I lowered the gun.

Youre a fucking pussy, Piers hissed. His voice so full of venom towards me. How did someone so young get so much hatred inside of them? I blame the parents. I stood up and walked down the aisle of wooden desks and chairs to where Piers sat.

I forgot, I said, youre the big man arent you? Youre the one people should be afraid of. Youre the one who calls the shots and controls the classrooms and corridorsThose who dont like you, or follow you, you set about destroyingYou and your little gang. You think youre something specialYou really do, dont you? He leaned back on his chair so that he was resting on the back two legs of the chair only; the front legs completely clear of the floor. A defiant expression on his face. I smiled at him. I have to say, had the situation been reversedHad he been the one with the gun pointed at me. Id have been trembling. Id have done anything he asked to save myself from getting shot. Is he brave or mentally retarded? Well, I guess we can come back to youYou knowWhen youre ready to come forward, I said.

Long wait, he muttered. A cocky glance to his surrounding friends. Little show-off.

Well  long enough for you to start feeling better, I said. His defiant expression turned to one of confusion. I flashed him a smile and then hit him in the face with the butt of the handgun. His nose cracked and split open as blood immediately gushed over the table he sat at. One of his friends, a dark haired jock to the left of me, made a move as though to take me on; a move which stopped when he came face to face with the barrel of the gun. Be smart, I whispered. I backed away from themBack towards the front of the classBack to where I could see everyone.

Please stop! Mrs Price begged.

I shook my head. These peopleThey made my life miserableThey didnt stop. I asked them. David asked them. They never stopped. Even when we asked you for helpYou turned us away. Remember that?

Had I known

We tried telling you. You didnt listen!

I would have stopped it.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing, isnt it?

Thinking about hindsight I wonder whether I made things worse, for David and I, when I initially spoke up. Would things have turned out differently had I stayed quiet like Craig? David never said the general level of abuse had gotten worse because of me but he was the sort of person to keep that sort of thing to himself. Maybe it wasnt as frequent before I came? Could ask him. Doubt hell answer.

This isnt the way to put things right, Mrs Price continued. Youd think shed shut up but obviously its against her nature. They can get suspendedExpelled even

You really think they care whether theyre in school or not?


The third, fourth and fifth days were easier. They were even quite pleasant. Mainly because the back row of our class was empty as Piers and his friends didnt show up. Im not sure where they went and I dont really care. Their absence, probably due to the beating they gave David and I. No doubt they were scared to come in, expecting a one to one with the Headmaster; not that David and I told anyone what had happened. Sure, we were asked butWe figuredIts done. Its over. Move on. Hopefully Piers, and all, will move on too.

By the end of the third day, I was comfortable enough to make my own way around the school without needing David showing me everything but I still hung around with him. Definitely one of the good ones. Who knows, when I leave this school  as, no doubt, I will as soon as dad says were moving away  maybe, just maybe, this is a friendship that will stick. Be nice. Normally, when I move on, friendships are quick to disappear. Thats always disappointing.


Im sure theyll care, said Mrs Price as she still tried to convince me that grassing the bullies up was still the right thing to do.

I shook my head again. Do you know what they say about you?

I dont care

You should. Half of them want to fuck youDisrespectful to both you and your husbandThe other halfThey think you have a cock

Playground stuff

Not denying it

What?

Show us.

Dont be so ridiculous.

I said show usProve theyre lying, I pointed the gun at her.

What have I ever done to you?

My mind drifted back to the numerous occasions she made me, or one of my classmates, feel stupid in front of everyone else. Wed stand there, after she told us to stand, and not be able to do a damned thing to stop her from tearing us apart over the slightest thing. Talking in class, no homework, poor homework, not paying attention, not getting the required pass mark on one of her many surprise testsAnything could set her off. Sometimes it was justified but most of the time the dressing down we received was over the top and probably against the schools policies. I wonder if the school actually has any policies, thinking about it.

Come on, I said. Were waiting.

What do you want?

What do I want? I want to make you feel as little as you make us feel

I make you feel little?

You know you do and, more to the point, you know when youre doing it. You always have the same wry smile upon your face.

If Ive ever made you feel stupid, Im sorry She looks as though shes about to cry but I dont care. She deserves this. I aimed the gun directly at her eye so she could see straight down the barrel. Please dont make me do this I pulled the hammer back once more, having carefully released it earlier. She started to cry. I, on the other hand, started to get excited. The feeling of power Im wielding, I could get used to this. Okay she said. She stood up, with her legs shaking, and unzipped the back of her tight black skirt. She paused, perhaps hoping I was going to tell her I was joking and she didnt have to remove it. Ill be doing no such thing. I could feel myself harden. Is it wrong to ask Rebecca to come back over? Maybe I should test out Mrs Price? Well, that is if she doesnt have a cock. Dont think I fancy a blow job from a woman with a prick.

What are you waiting for? I asked; a wry smile on my face. Her face reddens as she drops her skirt. I cant help but feel a little disappointed to note she isnt wearing stockings but rather tights instead. On the plus side, theyre over the top of a white cotton thong. Not quite the PVC or latex we were expecting to see. Perhaps she saves that for the weekends and days where she works the detention hall? A further plus to the situation reveals no penis. Just a nice mound where her pubic bone is. Id love to fuck her. I bet she fucks like a good un.

Happy? she asked, fighting back her tears.

What do you think class? a quick scan of my fellow classmates, of which I thought the lads would be grateful for this, revealed no one was looking at Mrs Price. They were all looking directly at me. Look at her! I ordered and they did. I looked back at Mrs Price, Turn aroundLet them see you Following instructions like a good little student, she turned on the spot. She looked at themA look in her eyes suggesting she was hoping one of them would come and help her, perhaps give her a jacket or something to wrap herself in. Bend over I ordered.

Surely this is enough, she said.

I shook my head. Not yet. Bend over. She wept as she bent over, facing me. Now turn around, I said. She did as she was told until her sweet arse was facing me directly. I can see the outline of her pussy lips through the material of both the tights and the thong. It makes me wonder what it would taste like. Perhaps a step too far? Ill have a bet Im not the only one thinking along those lines, though. Even Piers, through his bloodied face, must be fancying a taste too. I should have made him turn around. I didnt mean to give him such a delightful treat. I licked my lips at the thought of what her juices would taste like and shifted in my chair. Ive heard people say it tastes of fish but I dont believe it. I hope it doesnt. Im not a fan of fish. Im hoping it tastes like chicken like one of my other friends described. Maybe Ill be in this school long enough to make a relationship with a girl. Thatd be nice. But thenMaybe I could just pull Mrs Price towards me nowPull her towards me, rip her tightsPull her knickers to one side and give her a lick. My mouth is watering. Im tempted but I wont. Not because I dont really want to and not because she isnt attractive. Its justShe is older than me. Maybe too old? Maybe she is past her sell by date and her creamy juices are off? Perhaps that is when they taste of fish. All this picturing what it tastes likeRebeccaIm ready for round two



5

She is fit, though, I said to David. He didnt answer. He just smiled as he tucked into his lunchtime sandwich. I mean, how are we supposed to concentrate when faced with that every day? I definitely would

I wouldnt, said David. He swallowed his mouthful and took a sip of his carton of orange.

What?

I said I wouldnt.

You wouldnt want to sleep with Mrs Price? I asked with a surprised tone of voice. David shook his head. Youre kidding me, right? I think youre the only person who doesnt want to sleep with herI mean, as long as the rumours arent true and she doesnt have a manhood growing down there.

Not my cup of tea, said David. I looked at him again. It was hard to tell whether he was having a laugh or not.

Not your cup of tea?

NoWellNot unless the rumours are true he continued.

WaitWhat? You want to sleep with her if she does have a cock?

He smiled.

What? Are you gay?

David looked me straight in the eye as he swallowed his next mouthful of cucumber sandwich, Yes

Oh

Is that a problem?

I shook my head, No, not at allJustYou knowWhen Piers and his friends were calling you gayI just thoughtWell, you knowI thought they were name calling. I didnt realise they were stating actual fact. Not really any of my business There was an awkward pause, Im not, by the way

David laughed, Its okay, Im not about to pounce on you. I kind of guessed you werent going by conversations weve been having! ButI meanHow do you know if youve never tried it? I looked at him with a worried look on my face. He gave me a wink and suddenly responded by bursting out with laughter, Im messingJesus, should have seen your face.

Yeah, good oneOkayYou got me I started to laugh; a delayed reaction.

I didnt care whether David was straight or gay. His sexual preferences were of no concern to me. Just because he was homosexual, it didnt mean I couldnt have him as a good friend and, sitting here with him in my first week, I felt lucky to consider him a buddy.

The story about you and Mr Fitzpatrick? I asked when he had stopped laughing long enough for me to get a word in edgeways.

That is a lie, he said.

Fair enough

I just wish I had! he started to laugh again. His infectious laughter set me off too. I mean, his arseTo die forSeriously

Dude, please stop I said, still laughing.

Oh, I see, its okay for you to discuss Mrs Prices arse but not okay for me to discuss his tight, round buttImagine those muscles squeezing around your cock as you try not to squirt deep inside him

Dude! Im not listening anymore

And hed be groaning, and moaningBegging even, to have it deeper in himDeeper and harder

I put my fingers in my ears, Im not listeningI cant hear your disgusting thoughtsLa La Laaaaaaaa..

David cracked up and, as a result, thankfully stopped.

Youre sick, I told him.

What are you two laughing about? asked a pretty girl from my class. I think her name was Rebecca; the girl who sat in front of David. As soon as she got our attention by speaking, David stopped laughing and fell silent.

You dont want to know, I said. I didnt know her well enough to be sure shed appreciate the comments between David and I. I had seen her hanging around with Piers, and his narrow-minded friends so

Listen, I just wanted to say I think you two were really cool she went on.

How so? I asked.

Im not stupid. None of us are. We know who caused those bruisesYou not grassing them up to the HeadThat was cool She smiled at me, a flash in her beautiful eyes.

WellThanks I said. I felt myself blush; an annoying habit whenever a pretty girl spoke to me. I wonder whether, in years to come, Ill be able to control thatBetter yet, I wonder whether it will stop completely. Thatd be nice.

Some of us are having a party this SaturdayBe nice if you could both come. Show there are no hard feelings between anyone. You know, a fresh start she continued.

I looked at David, Sounds good, would do you think? He didnt answer, he just stared at Rebecca as though he were expecting a punchline to some amazing joke she was telling. David?

I cant, he said. Busy. Some gay thing.

Thats too bad, said Rebecca, it would have been niceAndI could have got to know you a little better too. Her eyes were fixed on me. It was everything I could do to keep focused on her and not her cleavage. Look, if you change your mind she fished in her pocket and pulled out a small card with a phone number on itJust give me a call and Ill pass on my addressBe nice if one of you could make it at least.

I took the card off her and, just as suddenly as she had appeared, she vanished back into the crowds of pupils all milling about with their lunches.

I turned to David, I knew they were hiding from us. Scared of whether we had gone to the teachersIts good, isnt it? A fresh start she said. Might leave me alone from here on inUs alone. Both of us. Come on, it will be a laugh

Have you heard the term fuck-buddy? asked David.

Of course I have

Well she is fuck buddies with most of the school butI think her and Piers are more than that. Shes a piece of shit.

She seems nice enough to me, I said. I smelt the card in my hands, Even her card smells like perfumeCome on, it will be a laugh, I said.

You can go if you want but I dont want to. Wherever they are, I tend to avoid.

You mind if I go? I didnt want to upset David but at the same time I didnt want to miss the chance to put things right with everyone. It would be nice to come to school not wondering whether Im going to get another hiding or not.

You do what you want, said David. I could tell by his tone that he didnt think it was a good idea and, more to the point, he didnt really want me going butSurely he wouldnt fall out with me just because I chose to try and put things rightThe chance to have things easier for both of us. How great would that be?


I couldnt help but think how great this was, as Mrs Price pulled her skirt back up and took her seat amongst my fellow classmates. Her face is still red and the tears, in her eyes, are nothing more than an added bonus. I have a feeling, if she survives this, she wont be so keen to belittle any of her students again. Hell, she might even quit. Never teach again. No loss to the education system, thats for sure.

Rebecca was still crying in her seat too. Two scarred, hopefully for life, and one battered. Im just disappointed the bruises will heal.

Well, Piers, you ready yet? I hope he tells me to fuck off or something similar from his lacking intelligence; give me another reason to smash him in the face. Normally Im against violence. I dont think it solves anything. Thats partly why I never fought back on the occasions they jumped me. I meanIgnoring how big he is in comparison to my skinny frame anyway. Even if I had wanted to fight back, I wouldnt have gotten very far. Id have covered even less metaphorical distance on the times his friends were helping to give me a hiding. I never understood why he had them help  its not as though he needed a hand.

Piers tipped his head back so it was facing me. His nose was still bleeding. How satisfying. Im loving this. Its nearly making me as hard as the sight of Mrs Prices cunt and the feeling of Rebeccas tongue. With his hand away from his face, he raised his middle finger.

Oh, Happy DaysA sadistic smile spread across my mouth. Like I said, normally Im against violence but, I wont lie, its slowly starting to grow on me.



6

Are you going to want us to pick you up? asked my mum. The problem with my mum is that she wasnt trying to be helpful. She was trying to be nosy. She just wanted to get a glimpse of my new friends. No doubt she wanted to thank them for taking me under their wings as I found my way around a new school. She was always the same. It was embarrassing. The friends I did make often asked whether my mum would be home before agreeing to come around for a night of gaming on the console. They said she freaked them out a little. I couldnt blame them. Her only son, she had a habit of treating me as though I was still a baby. Definitely embarrassing. When she first saw the bruises Piers and his friends inflictedShe wanted to frog march me back to school and demand the Headmaster expelled everyone immediately. I tried telling her it wasnt necessary. I tried telling her it would just make things worse for me butYou know how parents can be especially when they have a bee in their bonnet about something.

Im fine, I muttered as I pulled a clean, black shirt from my wardrobe.

Dont you have anything brighter you can wear? she asked. Youre always dressing in blackColour suits you so well

I want black. Black is cool, I said. I also perceived it was a power colour too. Mum once said she thought I was a Goth. I couldnt help but laugh. Im hardly a Goth. Its not like I wear make-up and dress head to foot in black and go around listening to heavy-metal whilst cutting myselfMind you, I dont really know any GothsMaybe they dont do that? Maybe its just bad movies portraying them in a negative light.

Well its nice to see you settling so quickly, she continued. Especially after what happened at the start of the weekDo you at least want a lift?

Its fine, mum, really. I can make my own way.

Well, if youre sure

I feel sorry for mum really. I know why she is so keen to be part of my life. Its because she doesnt really have her own life. She gets moved around just as much as me, because of dad. At least I have the chance to meet new friends and different people by going to school. She doesnt have to work. In fact, dad said he didnt want her to. He wanted her to be at homeKeep the house up together and meals on the table whilst he went out and provided. Old fashioned views, I guess. It did mean that mum didnt get to socialize with people her own age, especially as she lacked the confidence to join local groups that would have opened the door to meeting new, like-minded people. She just stayed in the house and went a little more stir-crazy each day.

Thank you, mum. Really. But Im sure.

She gave me a smile and said, Well, Ill leave you to get ready then and, with that, she left the room.

I do love her though.

* * * * *

My heart was beating fast and hard as I pressed the doorbell button to Rebeccas house. I know this is all for the best; a fresh start. A chance to turn the hatred Piers and the others feel for me into something more positive. Doesnt make me any less nervous though. Not a good thing, being nervous. I have a bad habit of being ultra-sarcastic, without meaning to be, or extremely quiet. Neither are traits which make me any more endearing. I wish David had come with me. At least thered have been someone here who definitely liked me.

Footsteps from beyond the door. Someone is coming. The door opened and Rebecca was stood there. A vision of beauty. She was dressed in a short black dress which looks as though its barely covering her backside. I wont lie; she looks hot. Really hot. Her face was done up with heavy make-up. Normally I prefer subtle butIt suits her.

You came! she exclaimed. She actually sounded as though she was pleased. I was hoping you would! She reached across to my hand and led me into the house.

I already feel as though Im out of my depth. She took me through to the lounge where Piers and his friends were sitting. There were six of them altogether. The room fell silent when they saw me. I feel sick but I cant show it. Piers was the first to stand up and walk over.

You didnt grass, he said, I respect thatAnd look, weve both said and done some stupid things butWhat do you say we start afresh? he sounded sincere.

Id like that, I said.

Youre alright, he said. He turned away from me and joined his friends again. Seconds later they were back to whatever it was they were talking about before I walked in.

See, said Rebecca, a fresh start.

I smiled at her. Was that it? Was that all that was needed?

Can I get you a drink? she asked. She didnt wait for an answer. Still holding my hand she pulled me through to the large kitchen which was crammed full of various drinks  mainly of a alcopop variety. We pretty much have everything here, she said.

Thats a lot of alcohol, I said.

Everyone chipped in. Whoops. Was I supposed to offer money too? A little bit of cash towards the alcohol pool? I dont have anything on me now other than the cash I need to get the taxi home. Could give her that. Could give mum a call to come and collect meNo. Forget that. I dont need her seeing Rebecca. Shell jump to conclusions, no doubt, that were a couple. Probably end up having the safe-sex speech and everything. Worse still, shell invite Rebecca over for Sunday dinnerAlthough, that wouldnt be a bad thingEver since I first saw her I thought she looked nice. Try that, she passed me a red drink. Not got a clue what it is and what itll taste like but I dont want to appear uncool by asking or refusing it.

Thanks, I said.

David couldnt make it, huh? she asked.

No, he said he was busy

A shame. Laughter boomed from the living room. Did you want to go upstairs so we could talk? Its quieter

Ummm, sure, I said. It was the first time I had had a girl inviting me upstairs. I desperately tried to sound relaxed and cool about it but Im pretty sure I failed. She smiled and led me through the house, back towards the stairs. She went up the stairs first, leading the way. I always thought I was a gentleman but, as I stared at her tight little arse the whole way upWellI guess Im not that much of a gentleman!

Its just through there, she pointed to a door across the landing from the stairs, Ill be right there  make yourself comfortable. She turned into what looked to be the bathroom and I crossed the landing to what turned out to be her room.

Weird. Everything is pink. Im not sure what I expected but Im pretty sure it wasnt a completely pink room. Pink walls, pink duvetEven the carpet is a lighter shade of pink. Definitely a young girls room. You wouldnt have guessed this was her room. I guess I half expected pictures of semi-naked pop stars hanging from the walls and make-up scattered around the placeHell, I even thought Id see different outfits dropped on the floor from where she was trying things on for her party. But, in this room, everything seems to have its own place. Speaking of which, dressed in black, I must really look out of place here!

Sorry about that, she appeared in the doorway behind me. I turned to look at her. Was it just me or did her breasts suddenly appear to beWell.larger? No complaints here. I tried to avert my eyes so as not to offend or come across as a creep. She simply smiled and walked past me, brushing my crotch with her hand. Was that a mistake? That smellShe smells even more so of the sweet perfume I caught a scent of when she first opened the door to me. Im not sure what it is but I like it. She sat on the bed and patted the mattress next to her. An invitation for me to join her? Embarrassingly, I felt myself harden. I can only hope she didnt notice.

I crossed the room and sat next to her. I wonder if I looked as nervous as I felt. Come on, youre supposed to be a man. Act like one. I have to say, I wasnt expecting your room to look like this, I said.

No? What were you expecting? She turned her body to face me and dropped her hand on my leg. I am now fully erect and feeling incredibly awkward. You look good tonight.

Thanks, I stuttered. Stupid. I should have told her she looked good too and not just tonight. She always looked good.

She laughed, You feel tenseRelax

Before I could answer she leant forward and kissed me on the mouth. Seconds later and she was kissing me again with her tongue down my throat. AggressiveNice

She pulled away slightly, Youre a good kisser.

I tried to answer but my mouth didnt want to work. BesidesI wasnt sure whether she was just saying that. Being kind. I wonder if she could tell it was my first kiss. She leant in again with her left hand on my cheek. As she continued to kiss me, her hand stroked down my cheek with her nails scratching me ever so gently. Lower it wentDown my neckDown my chestUntil it rested on my crotch. She made a funny mmm noise from her mouth and, using both hands, fussed around with my belt until it was undone  allowing her access to do the same to my jeans. Is this really happening? I desperately wanted to touch her, like she was touching meI wanted to feel the softness, and warmth, of her skin. I wanted to feel her breastsI wanted to but didnt. I was just frozen to the spot; allowing her to do as she pleased.

Ooh, big boy, she purred as she freed my erection from the confines of my boxer shorts. I feel like I should stop her. Perhaps get to know her a little first? I thought the correct order was a few dates, holding hands, couple more dates, a first kiss, more holding hands and then, eventually, some kind of sexual act. I didnt think it would be like this. I have some condoms in the drawer over there she whispered in my ear. Fuck it. Holding hands is lame anyway.

Sure, I stammered, my hands still frozen to the mattress.

She jumped off the bed and walked across the room, leaving me on the bed momentarily.

Now! she suddenly yelled. Within an instant, the bedroom door flew open and Piers burst in with a mobile phone in his hand and a huge, evil smile on his face.

Gross! What are you doing! Having a wank in Rebeccas little sisters room? You know how fucked up that is? Shes only eight. You fucking pervert!

I didnt know what was going on nor did I hang around for an answer. I got up as quickly as I could, turning my back to the mobile phone, and adjusted myself to hide my erection. The sound of Rebecca laughing, from the corner of the room, echoing through my worried mind

So much for a fresh start.



7

If Piers had meant what he had said, that evening, about us having a fresh startIf Rebecca hadnt tricked me into making me look stupidRight now, Mrs Price would, no doubt, be shouting at one of us for handing in a below par homework assignment. As it is, shes just sat there, looking mortified at what shes just done. Rebecca is still sniffling away in the corner of the room and Piers is still bleeding as he deserves to.

Have another little think, I said to Piers as I went back to the front of the classroom, and well have another chat in a bit, I said. Back at the front of the class, I turned to Ben Griffin and Daniel Gordon. Two of Piers closest friends. Unlike the physical violence Piers liked to dish out, these two were too weak to do much damage, like that. Instead they preferred the tried and tested method of name-calling. Whoever said sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me clearly hasnt been on the receiving end of people who spend the vast majority of their time using hateful words. Ive lost count of the amount of times, in my short time in this school, where Ive been on the receiving end of a bout of name-calling from these two narrow minded little pricks. Its stupid of me, and others, to get hurt by it butYou hear something enough times and you start to believe it. It wears you down. Ben and Daniel, can you come to the front of the class please? Im not sure why I said please. I dont need to say things like that anymore. I dont need to be polite. Im the one in charge. It wasnt a friendly request. It was an order.

They looked at each other, unsure whether they should or not. A quick glance at Piers, who was barely conscious from the last pistol whipping he received, and the two of them stood up; neither of them wanting to be on the receiving end of that kind of brutality. I wonder, had they known what was coming their wayI wonder whether theyd still have chosen to stand up. I smiled. Slowly they came forward. Both of them were tall individuals. Both with dark hair. Both with dark brown eyes. Same size, width-wise, too. Youd be forgiven for thinking they were brothers.

Do you remember when David told you about Ben and Daniel? I asked Mrs Price. She didnt answer. How rude. Do you remember he reported that they kept calling him names? I remember. He told you how it upset him and how he didnt like it. He asked for your help and you told him not to be so silly. It was, after all, just name-calling. Which, by the way, is still bullying. Do you remember?

Yes, she nodded.

We were just playing around, said Ben.

Oh, well, thats okay thenPlease, take a seat I said. My sarcasm slipping out again. Ben, foolishly, went to move back to his seat at the back of the class, Dont you fucking move, I hissed. He froze on the spot. Good lad. Not as stupid as he appears. Tell me, what did you call David when you were playing around? I asked. Neither of them answered. Maybe theyve forgotten. Faggot. Queer. Beaver-leaver. Homo. Gay. Gayboy. RimmerJust a few of the names

We were just playing

You knew it upset him. You knew he didnt see it as playing.

Were sorry, said Daniel.

Too late. I tried not to show glee as they both looked as though they were about to cry. WellI supposeWe could kiss and make up They didnt say anything. They just looked at one another hoping one of them would understand what I was talking about. They turned back to me with blank expressions on their faces. There was a pause. Come on then, kiss and make up

After the video that Piers took on his mobile phone, was emailed to  as it turned out  everyone who subscribed to the schools digital magazine, which was run by the students, it was Daniel and Ben who started the rumour that I was a peodophile. It was them who stated the whole video couldnt be shown because it showed Rebeccas younger sister dancing for me in her underwear. They admitted that was a lie when the police were involved but not so everyone could hear  only the officers, my mum and Rebeccas parents. Rebecca denied being in the room at the time; her denial helped by the fact that the sound was muted with dodgy porn music edited over it. Ben and Daniel never did apologise for the trouble it landed me in. It didnt help that David was sulking with me too. He had warned me not to go and felt that I should have trusted what he said.

I dont understand, said Daniel.

Let me spell it out to you, I said. I want you to kiss Ben.

Daniel looked down to the gun, in my hand, and then over to Piers at the back of the room. He turned to Ben and leant forward. After he closed his eyes he gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

Well, I said, that was very sweet butI think you can do better than that. Kiss him like you mean it. I want to see tongues. You knowBecause Im such a faggot.

We didnt mean it! said Ben; a look of panic on his face and his voice shaking. PleaseWe didnt mean it. Okay?

Okay. Thanks. Means a lot to me. NowKiss. And look as though youre enjoying it.


The fallout from the leaked video footage was more or less over by the third week. At least, it was at school. At home mum still wouldnt let me go out and she still wasnt entirely happy with what had happened. I kept telling her it wasnt my fault but she just kept saying how embarrassing it was for the family. For the family? What about me? I didnt ask to have the video shown everywhere. I didnt want people seeing it. Im the one who has to go out and see the people who have seen the video. Its not like mum bumps into the people who watched it. Its not as though mum bumps into anyone.

Your father is going to be so disappointed when he gets home, mum kept reminding me.

Who cares what he thinks? Who cares what anyone thinks? Its not like well be here for very long! We never are!

And then what did she say? asked David. I was sat with him in the cafeteria. It was the first time we had spoken properly since the video leaked.

She said I was ungrateful. Apparently dad does all this for meMoving aroundThe workingApparently its all for me but thats rubbish.

How so?

If they wanted the best for me, theyd have left me in the same school. They wouldnt move me around. Theyd want me to meet new people, make new friends and, more importantly, keep them!

Dad works because its what he wants. He doesnt give a shit about me or mum. Pretends he does butHe doesnt.

David didnt say anything. I guess he realised I just needed to vent.

Well, Im sorry for everything you went through, he said eventually.

Thank you.

But

Dont say it.

I told you so

I gave him a look which said thanks for that. He simply smiled.

Everything sorted now though? he asked. I mean, with regards to the police and Head?

I nodded, I nearly got expelled for it.

I saw the film he smiled, impressive.

Oh, fuck you.

David laughed.

Look outa new film in the making, said Daniel.

I span around and saw Daniel and Ben on the table behind us. They were laughing, like they usually were when they were mocking someone or something. A real life version of Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dum. David rolled his eyes.

Who do you think will be the giver and who will be the taker? asked Ben.

I didnt say anything. There was so much I could say butThere was no point. I had already learnt that smart arse comments dont make them go away. Today was all about trying something new; ignoring them. I looked at David and hoped hed stay quiet too.

LookLook at the way theyre looking at each otherTheyre going to kiss


Look I said to my fellow classmates, Look, theyre going to kiss

Please, said Ben. Weve said were sorry.

And I appreciate it. Now kiss. I raised the gun up to his face. I wont be asking again

Ben and Daniel looked at each other. A slight pause as they both processed what they were going to have to do.

Wait! I suddenly yelled. They pulled away from each other. Wait There was relief on their faces. I took up a mobile phone, from the table on the teachers table, and loaded up the camera. Okay, now you can kiss. They knew I wasnt joking. AndAction

There was a long pause as they just looked at each other. They turned to the camera. Off shot I waved the gun in the air. They looked back to one another. They knew what they had to do. The funny thing is, though, they dont know the half of what they have to do. Today, they are my performing monkeys and Im going to make the most of it.

Kiss him, faggot, I hissed.

Mrs Jones shifted uneasily in her chair. Probably remembering her little show and tell for the class. I shot her a glance to keep her quiet. By the time I looked back to Ben and Daniel they were standing nose to nose. Be interesting to see who makes the first move. My money is on Ben. Bender Ben has a certain ring to it. Daniel leaned forward and kissed Ben on the mouth. Im glad I didnt put any real money on it. They stopped and turned to me. I hadnt moved. I was still pointing the camera at them. That wasnt a kiss. Not a proper one. Not like lovers. I peered out from behind the phones screen and gave them a stern lookA stern look they both understood. They turned back to each other. This time it was Ben to make the move. He stepped forward and tilted his head to the side with his mouth slightly opened. Daniel moved closer too, his mouth also open slightly. Soon their lips were interlocked in a passionate embrace. I could be wrong butThey look as though theyre enjoying it. Certainly making for interesting footage. Wonder what the rest of the school will think of it when I email it to the same people Piers emailed when he made his little video?



8

Lets go, I said to David. I did my best to ignore the comments from Ben and Daniel; did my best to rise above it but they were starting to annoy me and I knew David would have been feeling the same.

Aw, where are you going? Daniel asked.

Toilets, I expect, said Ben. Probably want to have a little sausage for their pudding. They laughed. Other people, who were sat around them listening, also laughed. Very funny.


Ben and Daniel pulled away from their kiss. A little string of saliva was the last to snap away from their embrace.

So how was that? I asked. I have to say, and Im sure Im not alone in saying this, it looked as though you both enjoyed it. Did you? They didnt answer. First time ever theyve both been silenced. Should have done this ages ago. Remove your trousers. They both looked startled. No doubt they had hoped I was going to let them sit back down. Theyre wrong. Im not done with them. Im a way off being done. Daniel undid his trousers and dropped them to the floor. Well, looks as though your efforts werent up to his standard, I said to Ben. Ben didnt budge. Your turn. Again, he didnt move. Help him, DanYoure his friend, arent you? Youd hate for him to be hurt, right?

Daniel turned to Ben, PleaseJust do as he saysDont make me

Ben reluctantly lowered his trousers and I couldnt help but laugh when I noticed he was hard. I guess Dans the better kisser, huh? Ben went bright red, as did Daniel. Were still not done yet, though. I bet you could murder a little sausage right about now, huh? Some nice pudding

I stepped forward and pulled Bens shorts down. His erection popped up, standing to attention for the whole class to see and be disgusted by. I dont want to look too closely but I bet its covered in pre-cum.

You talk about it all the time, I said to Daniel, because I reckon its what you wantYOU want to have a little sausage for pudding

What? No. No

I think you protest too much. Heres your chancePut him in your mouth.

Please, noIm not gay.

Me neither but you two insisted on saying I was just because I was friends with someone who happened to choose that particular path in life. And that wasnt the worst that you said, let us not forget thatNow, put him in your fucking mouth and keep him there Daniel didnt move. I stormed over to him and swung the gun down to his knee-cap, catching him on the side. He let out a squeal and dropped to his knees. I said, put him in your fucking mouth

Just do it, said Ben.

See, hes begging for it. He wants you toThis little faggot herePut him in your mouth.

Someone fidgeted in their seat behind me so I swung around with the gun and aimed it at them. They froze. I turned back to Daniel and pressed the gun against his temple.

The lesson is almost over. You can nearly walk away from thisIf you dont do thisIf you refuseYou wont walk away.

Slowly he edged closer and closer to Bens penis. He opened his mouth and let the shaft slide to the back of his throat. Ben moaned. Not sure if that was a groan of pleasure or one born from being uncomfortable.

Doesnt that taste good? I asked. Now move back and forwardsYouve seen how the ladies do it in the movies you have undoubtedly watchedDo it. Do it.

Daniel started to move back and forwards, just as I had told him to, and Bens moans became more frequent. Every time Bens penis hit the back of Daniels mouth, Daniel couldnt help but gag.

You like that? I asked Ben. His eyes were shut. Im not sure if he was picturing Daniel sucking him off or picturing, perhaps, Rebecca or Mrs Price. Either way, this wasnt for him to be enjoying. With no warning, I turned to Daniel and kicked up, as hard as I could, between his legs. The sudden rush of pain caused his mouth to clamp shutI was surprised at how far the blood spurted, from Ben, when Daniel moved away. Both of them dropped to the floor in agony.

Whos next? I asked the class.

John, one of the quieter members of the group, jumped up and made a dash for the door. I was unsure of his intentions. Maybe he wanted to get help for Ben. Maybe he wanted to escape his own lesson. Either waySilly move considering I wasnt exactly so far away I wouldnt get to the door first. I thrust the gun in his face.

Sit the fuck down.

Im still amazed at how easy it is to control a small group with one handgun. Surely they must realise I dont have enough bullets for all of them? I guess none of them are willing to sacrifice themselves in order to save their friends. The cowards. All they need to do is rush me. I probably wouldnt even be able to empty the entire clip. It is, indeed, a selfish world we live in.


I hate this place! David exclaimed when we were away from Ben and Daniels earshot. There are all these anti-bullying posters around making it look as though the school actually gives a damn but they dont. They dont give a flying fuck about their pupils getting bullied. I didnt say anything. I just let him have his little rant. Ive been to the teachers before but they dont care. They dont want to know. If they do say anything to the people involvedIts half-hearted. Its not meant and certainly isnt enough to deter them. It makes me sick. Just shows you really are alone. He started to cry. Should I put my arm around him? Not sure. Would he get the wrong idea? All that talk about sticks and stones breaking bones but words never hurtingBroken bones heal. Bruises heal. Harsh words can have a long, lasting effect. I couldnt argue with him. He had a point. He looked to me, Youre not doing a very good job of making me feel any better.

Im sorry, I stammered. Not really sure what to say.

Anything! he said.

After a slight pause, There, thereEverything will be okay He couldnt help but laugh at how useless I was. Comforting people never really was my strong point. I guess I dont really have the family background to afford me that little life skill. Dad was always working and mum would always over compensate which I found annoying. So what do you want to do?

I just wish I could make them all suffer.

Well, Im sure that would be great butI dont think its very practical. Besides, I meant what do you want to do now?

Im not going to class. Fancy going to the cinema or something?

I nodded. Hopefully hell be paying.


Daniel was on the floor, at the front of the class, crying with blood smeared around his mouth. Im not sure if he is crying because hes just bitten his friends penis off or crying because of the pain from being kicked. Maybe a little bit of both? Ben, on the other hand, is deathly quiet in his unconscious state. He looks pale. I wonder whether hell eventually end up bleeding to death from his injury? Maybe. If he does, he brought it upon himself.

Go back to your seat, I said to Daniel.

Slowly he stood up and walked down the middle aisle back to his seat  all of his classmates staring at him. I liked how everyone was looking at him. All staringAll judging for what he has just done. He wont be able to forget their looks. Theyll be with him foreverJust as the taste of human flesh will haunt him.

I looked around the class. Whos next? My eyes settled on a girl at the front of the class. She immediately started to cry. She knows it is her turn.

Please, I havent done anything to you Its true. She hasnt done anything to me. Its only from hearing her call out, during the many registrations we have sat through, that I am aware of her name; Chloe. Please

I know you havent, I said. But this isnt all about me. I turned to look at the seven stood behind me; David, Lindsey, Elizabeth, Marcus, Samantha, Kate, HelenThey all look to be enjoying my little floor show. I turned back to ChloeSitting there, looking pretty with her short, dark hair and her big brown eyes, carefully applied make-up used to enhance her looks as opposed to hide them behind an unnecessary layer of slap. Looking into her eyes, she already looked as though she were going to start crying. Pathetic. Youd have thought people who were nasty to other peopleYoud have thought it would have been harder to break them but this is proving fairly easy. Come to the front of the class, I instructed her. Lets have a chat.

Reluctantly Chloe stood up. She gave a glance in the direction of her friends. No doubt she was hoping one of them would step forward and offer her some assistance. Not a chance. They didnt want to get involved. They didnt want the spotlight turned onto them. Chloe stood a few feet away from me. I had never really noticed before how skinny she was. I wonder if she was naturally that skinny or whether she was one of these girls whod eat a meal just to sick it back up in the toilet when they thought no one was looking?

Lindsey All I did was say a girls name and Chloe started to cry. She knew where this was going. Do you want to tell the class what you did to Lindsey? Chloe shook her head. Oh, come on nowDont be shyWould you rather we asked Lindsey?

Please stop it.

They all say the same thing. Its getting tiresome. Im not going to stop, just as they didnt either when they were asked. Fair is fair, after all.

You look nervous. Dont be. Were all friends, arent we? HereI got you something I reached into my rucksack, which I had left by the table at the front of the class, and pulled out a tupperware box. I pulled the lid off and showed Chloe the contents. Chocolate cake

I dont want any.

Of course you do, dont be ungrateful. I got one for you and one for your friend LindseyYou know she likes cakes.

Im sorry.

For what? Youve done nothing to be sorry forHave you? Have I missed something? I hadnt missed anything. I knew what Chloe had done. She would spend her time, with her friends from the year above, following Lindsey around taunting her because of her weight. Lindsey being one of the schools larger pupils. Im not sure if it was because she over-ate or some genetic thing which made her so. It wasnt important. The consequences of their words always had the same ending; Lindsey would cry herself to sleep, sometimes cutting herself before she climbed into her bed.

We need to get Ben some help, said Mrs Price. She wasnt watching Chloe and I. Her eyes were fixed on Ben. He looked pale, there was no denying that. Hes dying

Im talking to my friend. Please dont interrupt me again, I said. I turned back to Chloe and handed her a cake. Eat it.

Im not hungry.

You can eat it willingly or I can feed you. I dont mind which.

She looked back to her friends. None of them made a move to help her. Slowly she took the cake from me and looked at it.

It looks good, doesnt it? I asked. I made it myself.

Please, Im not hungry.

Of course you are. Look at it! How can that not make you hungry?

The cake did look good. Chocolate sponge covered in chocolate icing. I would have eaten it myself. Had I not put in the little extra ingredient. Chloe moved the cake closer to her mouth. Slowly her mouth opened. It must be watering in there. How could it not? The cake looks amazing. I should set up a little shop. Start selling them. I could make a fortune.



9

I was sitting with David, in the cinema, waiting for the film to start. He paid; some chick flick he had wanted to see. I should have known when he invited me to a film that it wouldnt have been a typical horror for boys to enjoy. Ah well, I couldnt grumble; it was still better than being in class, I suppose. Just.

So how would you teach them a lesson? I asked him.

Not really thought about it.

Really?

Okay, Id make them kiss each other, he said, a split second later.

What?

Piers and his friendsIn front of the whole classId make them kiss each other. That way they couldnt call me gay anymore.

They couldnt?

Of course not The lights dimmed and the screen flickered into life. David whispered to me, If everyone has seen them kissTheyd hardly be in a position to carry on calling me gay! I didnt answer him. I suppose, all being said and done, he had a point.

Howd you make them kiss? I asked.

He shrugged, I dont knowWave a gun in their face?

I laughed, You have thought about this, havent you?

Lots, he answered immediately. Want some of my popcorn? He tipped his large tub of popcorn towards me.

I shook my head, No thanks. Hate popcorn. It tastes like shit.


A smile spread across my face as fresh dog shit dribbled down Chloes chin. I guess the little stint in the oven made it runny? Should have expected that, not that its a problem. It was probably worse for her, to have it trickle down her face. Shell be tasting that for days. As soon as she realised what it was, she gagged and spat the cake onto the floor.

No! I shouted. You must eat it all! I grabbed the cake and shoved it into her mouth. My hand clamped across her face to stop her from spitting it out once more. She struggled, in my grasp, but I didnt release her until I felt her swallow some of it. Thats itGood girl I couldnt help but think of Rebecca swallowing my own poison too. A smile spread across my face. As soon as I let go of Chloe, she threw up on the floor. Its starting to smell in hereWhat with the blood, puke, shit and stench of fear. Thank God the lesson is nearly over. Itll be nice to get some fresh air. You can sit down now, I whispered to Chloe when she finished sicking up, what she had eaten, onto the floor. She stood up and made her way back to her seat, spitting as she went.

Youre going to burn in Hell for this, said Mrs Price. You know that, dont you? She didnt look scared of me anymore. She looked angry. A familiar expression we, as a class, were used to. Maybe she knew I wasnt going to actually shoot anyone? Your mum and dad will be known around the world for what you have done. Youll be rotting in prison, and then Hell, and theyll be having to live with the consequences of your actions.

Then I guess, with all of us residing there, Hell will be full.

Just let us go before you do something youll regret.

Ill regret nothing of today.

You say that now but in years to comeYoull realiseThis wasnt the way

I turned to David, behind me. The look on his faceThe look of sorrow. Lindseys faceHaving just seen her tormentor eat dog shitI wont regret anything about today.

When youre quite finished, I said, theres still much to do.

Youre a psycho, she continued.

No, Im not. Im a product of my surroundings. YouAll of you sitting hereYou all made me.

Thats rubbish, said Mrs Price. I knew I could count on her to ruin my buzz. People are bullied every day. You dont see them holding their class to ransom.

Im not holding anyone to ransom! As soon as the bell goes, youre all free to leave.

Let us go now!

Now you know youre not allowed to wander the corridors during lesson time. You can get sent to the Heads office. You can go as soon as the bell goes. Those arent my rules. Theyre the schools

Theyd allow an exception

I glared at her, Did you want to come to the front of the class again? Have you not learned your lesson? She didnt say anything. Thats what I thought.

I turned back to the seven behind me. Lindsey seems satisfied how I dealt with Chloe. David seems to be quieter than usual. Funny, really, considering this was his plan initially. Five more students who need someone to fight their battles for them; Elizabeth, Marcus, Samantha, Kate, Helen. Im not entirely sure Ill be able to help them all. Not entirely sure there is time enough to deal with each of their complaints. Never enough time.


Where have you been? asked mum as soon as I stepped into the family home. I didnt answer her straight away. I wasnt expecting to be bombarded with her questions as soon as I walked in. Couldnt exactly tell her I had been at the cinema with David. Shed be mad that I hadnt gone to school. She might even be mad enough, after the video incident, to report it to dad too  when he comes home from workIf he comes home from work. I asked you a question  where have you been? Dinner is ruined. Dinner wouldnt have been ruined, I doubt she would have even cooked it yet.

I was in the library with David, I lied. Stupid, really, as she knew it would be a lie. I cant remember the last time I went to a library.

The school phoned.

What?

They phoned. Apparently you didnt show up for registration after lunch. They wanted to know if everything was okay.

They actually called?

Yes

They do that?

So where were you? Mums face reddened. I knew she was mad. One of the signs she was angry was when her face went a bright shade of red; similar to if she were embarrassed. The thing with mum, though, is that shed only be angry because she wouldnt have known where I wasBecause she would have been worriedNot because I didnt go to class. Well?

I was at the cinema

With David?

Yes, with David. We had some problems at lunchtime and couldnt face going back for the afternoon. We didnt think it would be a problem

More like you didnt think the school would have called?

And that

Look, mum, I dont like it there. The name-callingThe bullying

Theyll settle down, its just because youre new.

What? No. No its not. Its because I am friends with a homosexual and I dared stick up for him. You saw what happened with the video. You saw that. The trouble I got intoIts going to carry on. God only knows what theyll do next. I dont want to go back

You have to go back! Im sure theyll soon get bored and move onto someone else.

Its different to the way it was when you were at school, mumYou know, when the world was in black and white and you didnt lock your front door at night

Well youre going back tomorrow. If you want I can go in with you.

I couldnt help but laugh. I didnt mean to. Thanks but Im pretty sure that wont help!

Well just stand up to them then! Now promise me you wont bunk off again. I didnt say anything. Promise me.

Fine. I promise. Whatever. I pushed past her to head up the stairs to my room. I knew it was pointless telling her about what was happening at school but figured there was nothing to lose. Nothing to lose, at least, other than my patience. Once upstairs, and in my bedroom, I closed the door for some privacy. I dont know how David does it. Hes been dealing with this for months now, Ive only had it for a couple of weeks and its getting to me. Perhaps its because I am tired; tired of moving around from school to schoolHome to homeTired of the pressures of playing catch up with school workTired of having to meet new people and try and make new friendsTrying to pretend that everything is okay, at home, when reallyIve had enough of my mums constant smothering and the fact my old man is never there  always working for the Ministry of DefenseIm even tired of not knowing, exactly, what he does for a living which causes us to move around so much. Im just tired. Ive had enough. AndI cant believe the school phoned home on my first missing afternoon. So much for escaping from time to time, to get some peace and quiet. I cant have them call home all the time. Itll only cause issues at home too. Then therell be no escape.

The door opened and mum came in, Your friend David is downstairs. Is he okay? His face looks terrible

What? I jumped off the bed, where I had slumped, and hurried downstairs. David was standing at the foot of the stairs with his face all battered and bruised. What happened? I asked.

Ive had enough! he said before I had even finished my sentence. Ive fucking had enough of it all David was getting more upset. It looked as though the only reason he wasnt already crying was because he was so angry. All of themIve had itIm not going backThats it

What happened? I asked again. Jesus Christ, DavidJust tell me!

PiersHis friendsThey happened. Outside my house, man. Outside my house.

What about your parents? They didnt see what happened?

Theyre not home. They never get home until later in the evening. They fucking waited for me outside my house.

Mum appeared behind me, Are you okay? she asked David.

No, of course hes not okay. Look at him! I said. This is what its like at school. Those bulliesThe ones you said would leave us aloneThis is what they do I felt myself getting as angry as David. Come on, I said to him, you can get yourself cleaned up in the bathroom. I led the way for him whilst mum just watched, a look on her face which suggested she still didnt get it. I couldnt help but wonder what it would take for her to understand.



10

You okay now? I asked David. We were standing outside his front door having been given a lift by mum. She waited in the car whilst David and I chatted.

Im fine, he said. I didnt believe him. I was worried about him. He didnt really seem as though he was there; the lights were on but he wasnt home.

I looked towards the living room window. The lights were on so I guess one, or both, of his parents were home now. Are you going to tell them what happened?

Dont think I can hide it His face did look a mess. It wont make a difference, though. Theyll still make me go back tomorrow.

They dont care?

Dad said once that it was deserved.

What? How?

Because

Youre gay? I asked. David didnt say anything but I guessed thats why his dad felt as though he deserved a beating from time to time. There was a slight pause. You going to be okay?

He shrugged, Whats the alternative?

Itll get better, I said, not that I believed my own words. It has to get better. We dont actually deserve any of what we are being subjected to. David didnt react to what I said. Well, I continued, I best get backIll see you tomorrow. You never know, Piers and his friends might not show up againCould be scared youll get the teachers involved and theyll be suspended.

David shrugged. I turned to look at mum who was still sitting in the car. I could tell she was getting impatient but hated leaving David like this. I guess everyone has a breaking point and this must have been his. I dont blame him. I havent been here half as long as him and Im already close to mine. I turned back to David to continue our conversation but he was already stepping in through his front door. Without so much of a goodbye he closed the door. Maybe hell be back to normal tomorrow, after a good nights sleep?

I walked back to the car and climbed into the front seat, next to my mum.

He seems quiet, she said. I shot her a look.


What are you doing? asked Mrs Price. I was just standing there, in front of the class. My mind was elsewhere. Drifted off for a minute. Disappointed there isnt enough time to deal with them all individually. We need to get Ben some help.

Hes dead, I said. I didnt even look at him. I could tell he was dead. His breathing was noisy earlier. Now I cant hear it at all.

Youre going to prison said Mrs Price, For a very long time.

No, Im not. I smiled at her and glanced at the gun.

You killed someone! she continued.

So did Piers! I yelled. Chloe I pointed to where she was still weeping. Murderer! Lynn I pointed to a girl sat towards the back near to where Piers was sitting, Murderer! Robert one of Piers friends, MurdererJohn another lad close to Piers, even Ben and DanielTheyre all murderersThe only difference is they didnt pull a trigger.


Lessons are about to start. The class is quieter than usual. David is doing his usual trick of leaving it until the last possible minute to come to class. There are whisperings from the back row. I cant quite make them out. Something about David. I wonder, after last night, whether hes coming back to class or whether his mum and dad are finally pulling him out of here and sending him somewhere else?

I turned round to look at the back of the class. Piers and his friends are missing again. Same old story with them. They fight with someone and then disappear for a few days. A few days later they re-emerge from whatever hole they crawled into, as though nothing has happened. Pieces of shit. With the mood Im in, its probably a good thing theyre missing. For what they did last night, I dont think I could keep my calm. It wouldnt be so bad if it were just Piers by himself butHim and all of his gang? I would have just ended the same way as David did last night.

My attention turned to the back of the class, again, when the door opened. I half expected it to be David but it wasnt. Mrs Price walked in; a solemn expression on her face. Well, this is new.

The class watched, in silence, as she put her bag by her desk. She looked as though she was taking a couple of minutes to collect her thoughts.

Weve just heard, she said after a few more minutes, that last night David took his own life


No one in this class is innocent! I shouted. No one! I waved the gun around at each of the pupils. They tried their best to duck out of the way of the barrel. Not you! Not you! Not you! No one! You all need to learnYou need to be taught a lesson. The only innocent ones are standing here I turned to see David, Lindsey, Elizabeth, Marcus, Samantha, Kate and Helen.

Theres no one there, said Mrs Price.

Just because you dont see them, it doesnt mean they arent there but theyre always here. Always walking the corridors where they were tormented for so longWhat Im doingWhat Im here for today. Someone should have done this a long time ago

What youre doingThis doesnt make anything right. This doesnt change anything

It will! Dont you see. People will hear of this. This story will spread across the worldNewspapers, television programmesA warning to others who may be tormenting colleagues close to them

It wont. Youll just go down in history as another psychopath killing innocent people in their school

Just as David will be another suicide statistic?


Mrs Prices short words were all that was mentioned of David in the school  at least in front of the pupils. There were no speeches, in the morning assembly, offering people in the same position as David any help. There was no advice for handling bullies. There was nothing. Even the local newspaper hardly went into any details about it when it landed on the doorstep three days after the event.

My mum felt bad for me, as I had lost a friend, but then went onto say she could see it coming. She could see it in his eyes that he was a troubled young boy; a damaged soul. Teachers didnt have much to say either. Apparently David had a history of depression which he brought to the school with him  documented in his file from his previous school. I told them about the bullying but it was, more or less, brushed under the carpet. Piers and his friends, of course, denied everything. What made it worse, with regards to Piers and his buddies, was that every time I looked at them  they were laughing. Im not sure what about butDid none of them feel any remorse? Did they honestly believe they werent to blame for what happened to David?

What are you doing in here? mum asked. I was sitting in dads office. An office which was normally out of bounds due to the sensitive documents he sometimes had with him. I could never help but wonder why, if they were so sensitive, he brought them home and, more importantly, what difference it made whether we were allowed in the study or notIt wasnt as though he left them on his desk. They were all locked away in his large wall safe. Speaking of whichI was frantically trying to guess the combination. I asked you a question. The locking mechanism of the safe clicked open. Success. Having tried his date of birth, mums date of birth, my date of birthI was surprised when it clicked open on their wedding anniversary. In a world this shitty it was nice to see he still valued his marriage  more than can be said for some couples. Unless, of course, he just doesnt know how to change the combination code now that it is set. Get away from thereYour father will kill you.

I doubt it. Hes never here.

I pulled the door open. There it is. Just as I had hoped. I reached in and took hold of his handgun. His favourite piece to use whenever he is training new cadets. At least, thats what he tells me its for. For all I know he could have purchased it from the black market just as a source of protection for the house. I wonder if mum knew it was here? I only knew from when I had seen it over his shoulder.

Put that down! mum said sternly as I pulled the gun from the safe.

I cant. I need it.

Need it? For what?

I just looked at her. She knew what it was for. Did I really have to spell it out? I need it to teach them a lesson. All of them. Just as David wanted to do. Im doing it for David

Youre not leaving the house with it, mum said. She blocked the doorway. I can only hope she isnt going to test me. Youre not taking that to school, she continued  proof that she knew exactly what I wanted it for.

Yes, I am. I need to show them they cant push people around anymore. I need to show them there are consequences to their actions. They need to know Im not afraid. They need to know

Youre not afraid? Then you dont need to take a gun to school

I need to show them! I shouted. I could feel my eyes start to well up. Did you know David wasnt the first to kill himself at my school? There were others tooOthers who were bullied like David. The first I have heard of this was yesterdayIn the cafeteriaPeople talking about itRemembering the others who had taken their lives as well because they were bullied

So you go and hurt the one who bullied your friend? said mum. There will just be another bully further down the line. No matter what is said and done, there will always be someone to take their place.

There doesnt have to be. I can teach them. I can show them the error of their ways. I can show them. They wont hurt anyone again. They wont. And when news gets out about what Ive doneWhen the news gets out  no one will want to hurt anyone again

Youre being silly, said mum, the world doesnt work like that.

It can. No one has tried it yet.

Im sorry about your friend. You know I am. If you want to look at changing schools, Ill talk with your father when he calls

Whats the point? Every school is the same! I need to do this. Not just for me but people like David.

But

Lindsey, Elizabeth, Marcus, Samantha, KateHelenNow David. I found the newspaper reports on them on the school computer. They all killed themselves using various methods. All dead because of bullies

You dont know that, it could have been because

Of course it was to do with the bullies. There may have been something else in their life to upset them too but you know it would have been the likes of Piers who had tipped them over the edge. Every time I shut my eyes I see them standing there. Every time


I looked at the David and the others. Time was running out. Too much taken up with arguing with Mrs Price about what I was doing. How wrong I was. Im not a psychopath. Im not. Im the innocent one. David and the other six studentsWe are the innocent onesBacked into corners with no visible exit other than what Im doing here or suicide. I need to do this. Just skip across to Piers. He is the main culprit, in my eyes. Teach him a lesson so harsh the others will learn from it.

This is it.

This is what Ive been gearing towards.



11

Enough is enough, barked Mrs Price, give me the gun!

Who does she think she is giving orders like that? She forgets, this is my class. I am the one in charge. She is right, though, enough is enough. Ive already passed the point of no return. Now its time to end it.

Give me the gun! she screamed.


Id never heard my mum shout like that and it took me back a bit.

Give me the gun! she screamed again. I went to push past her but she grabbed for the gun. She was screaming for me to hand it over but I wouldnt. For a split second we both danced around the room, fighting over the gun, when suddenly a shot rang through the house  echoing in the small room we were in.


Mrs Price looked startled as I looked at her down the barrel of the smoking gun. Blood immediately poured from the hole in her chest. She dropped to her knees without another word and then face-planted onto the hard floor. The rest of the class screamed and immediately jumped up from their desks. Someone would have heard that. Someone would be coming now.


It doesnt matter if the sound of the gunshot does attract people. I wont be here. I didnt mean for it to happen. I didnt mean for the gun to go off but I cant stay here regretting whats happened. As I looked down at mum, who was lying face down in a pooling puddle of blood, I knew that none of this was my fault. I feel numb about what Ive done. Its not my fault. None of it. This is their fault. The bullies. Piers. This is his fault. Lessons start in less than an hour. I need to be ready. I only hope I can get this finished before they come for me.


I didnt care that the class was in a panic. I didnt care that some of them had dared to make a rush for the door. They could go. It didnt matter anymore. All that matters is himPiers. He is still in the back row of the class. Im not sure whether he is still too stunned to make a run for it or too stupid. Either way Im grateful. I didnt want to have to chase him through the school.

I stormed over to where Piers was sitting, smoking gun still in my hand, and grabbed him by his hair. He let out a funny little wail as I pulled him to his feet and marched him to the front of the classroom. By the time we get there, most of the class is empty. Its just meBen, Mrs Price and Piers. Even Daniel managed to get out of the room  no doubt racing off home to brush his teeth and rinse out the flavour of cock with extra strong mouthwash. Fucking faggot.

You did all this! I screamed at Piers. You!

It didnt matter about being quiet now. I knew they were coming for me. Someone would have called the police by nowSomeone would have run to the other teachers. Time is against me.

Fuck you! hissed Piers. I smashed him in the face with the butt of the gun and he let out of a scream. His front two teeth cracked on impact with the hard metal. Thats going to hurt in the morning.

No! Fuck you! You did all this. I raised the butt of the gun back into the air and dropped it down onto his face once more. A loud crack. Was that his nose? He looked dazed. Dont you fucking pass out

Stop! What are you doing? came a voice from the doorway.

I looked up to see the Head Teacher standing there with a look of horror on his face. I pointed the gun directly at him. He put his hands out in front of him as though theyd stop a bullet from flying towards him.

Tell me about David, I shouted.

What?

Tell me about DavidWhat sort of person was he?

There was a slight pause.

He was a confused la. he started.

I pulled the trigger and he dropped dead. David wasnt confused. David was a victim. Were all victims. Because of people like you, I said to Piers  the final string of my thoughts coming out vocally.

PleaseDont kill me he said. Have the beatings finally broken him down? Or was it the sight of the Head Teacher and Mrs Price getting a bullet? This hard man who gives off an image of someone who wont be controlled finally broken? I wont pretend not to be a little disappointed. I was looking forward to hitting him some more but, truth be told, its probably for the best. Im pretty sure I can already hear the sirens in the distance.

Im not going to kill you, I said to Piers. I want you to live with this. I want you to live with the knowledge you killed Mrs Price. You killed the Head. You killed my mum, you son of a bitch, and David. Even Bens death is because of you. Everything that happenedYour fault. Say it

Its my fault, he spluttered through broken teeth and bloody gums.

Louder! I ordered.

Its my fault, he repeated.

Shout it!

Its my fault! he shouted at the top of his voice.

Again!

ITS MY FAULT!

The sirens are outside now. Theyre here. Thats it. Game over.

Open your fucking mouth, I hissed. Piers was crying as he opened his mouth. Wider! I told him. Broken boy did as was instructed.

Doors are banging against walls in the corridors beyond the classroom. This is it. The lesson has come to an end. Seconds later there were officers standing in the doorway with guns pointed at me. Im sure there are more, waiting for their turn to take a pop, in the corridor.

DROP THE FUCKING GUN! one of them shouted.

I put my head against Piers face so that my ear was level with his mouth. I swear, despite the shouting police, I could hear his fear coming from his body. And smell it. Broken boy wet himself? I smile spread across my face as I placed the gun against my other ear.

I hope the knowledge he is responsible for all these deathsI hope it haunts Piers for as long as he lives. If he forgets, I hope the taste of my brains, in his mouth, serves as a distasteful reminder. As I ready myself to squeeze the trigger, I only hope the bullet doesnt go through my head, and his too. I cant promise it wont.

If it does. Its not the end of the world. Just his. I closed my eyes and readied myself. This is it. I wonder if it will hurt.

I love you.

A friendly voice, louder in my head than the shouting police officers and sirensI opened my eyes. David was standing slightly in front of me.

I love you, he said again, always have.

I smiled, I love you too. All this time and Ive only just come to realise I was living a lie. No previous girlfriend because, subconsciously, I didnt want it? I never realised. It doesnt matter now. I love you too, I repeated. I couldnt help but laugh. All this time I was trying to teach everyone else a lesson. Trying to teach them something, for their lives, and it was me who ended up learning something.

The school, town even, were quick to forget the previous seven who had killed themselves. I bet they arent as quick to forget the eighth.

I ignored the shouting, from the doorway, and squeezed the trigger.






