I had expected more trouble getting the police shotgun through airport security, but it turned out to be easy. It was unloaded and in a checked bag, so after a minimum of fuss and some paperwork, into the cargo hold it went.
Harder was taking the altar piece with me in my carry-on duffel. It radiated a sick dread that seemed to affect everyone around me. By the time we landed, the passengers and stewardesses were so close to bloodshed that the captain ordered everyone to their seats and cancelled drink service.
It seemed not to affect Anne and myself outside of making us uncomfortable, which made me wonder if being tainted by the unnatural made us more resistant. In any case, I couldn’t wait to be rid of the greasy, evil thing.
We rented another car and then stopped at a big discount store to get shotgun shells and ammo for my.45. Guns you can check pretty easily, with ammo it’s better to just buy it when you land.
Afterwards we had dinner at a vegetarian Indian restaurant. Anne was smug about dragging me in there, but the joke was on her, the food was delicious. By the time we were done it was getting late, so I checked us into a hotel.
You don’t go visiting elderly widows at midnight unless you’re looking for jewelry and pain killers. The hotel didn’t have adjoining rooms, so we got one with two beds. Safety won out over privacy.
The room was cheap, but clean. The carpet was mint green and the walls were yellow, but the room lamps weren’t bright enough to make it painful. I let Anne have the shower first because I like to think that I’m a gentleman. I stared at the ceiling listening to the sound of the water while I waited for my turn.
Shad’s narrow, rat-like face scowled at me from my memory. “I know,” I said under my breath. “The point of no return is coming up.” I began to weigh the lives of a lot of people that I didn’t know against the life of one girl I barely knew. It should have been easy math, but I guess I’m as selfish and shortsighted as the next person.
On the one hand, I felt responsible for whatever mayhem Piotr was up to these days, since I didn’t try to stop him when I had the chance. On the other hand, I increasingly felt the irresistible tug of life, and being able to confide in someone who knew my secret was a big part of it.
The fact that she was smart, funny, and beautiful didn’t hurt, either. Could I sacrifice her well-being, maybe even her life, in pursuit of righting an old wrong? Was it right to let countless people die to protect her, or did the greater good demand whatever sacrifice might be required?
I assumed that I wasn’t going to be coming back, but then I knew more than she did about what we would be facing. It’s one thing to hurl yourself onto a suicidal course with understanding and intent, but blindly following someone you trust down that path is something else entirely.
I heard the shower shut off, and Anne came out with one towel wrapped around her head and another around her body. She padded across the carpet and began digging around in her duffel. “Turn around.”
“You’re getting dressed in here?” I turned my back to her just in time to hear the towel drop to the ground.
“Well, you’ve already seen my ankles, there’s no mystery left now.”
“Very funny. I’m not that old.”
“Okay, I’m done.”
I turned back around, only to find that she was wearing nothing but a thin T-shirt and panties. “I thought you said you were done?”
“You were expecting a housecoat, maybe? I wasn’t planning on sharing a room with anyone when we bought clothes, and this is how I sleep. You’ll survive.” She put her damp towels in the bathroom, then slid into her bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. “There, happy?”
“Only if you go up another foot.” I took my shower.
A sound woke me. Red numbers floated next to my bed in the dark room, illuminating nothing. Icy dread gripped me as I became convinced that somehow a worm-infested killer had snuck into the room while we were sleeping. I listened hard, and I heard the sound again. It was a low, harsh gasp, and a faint rustle of bedclothes. It was coming from Anne’s side of the room. I slipped out of bed, my eyes perfectly at home in the dark as always.
Anne’s head was thrashing back and forth on her pillow and her hands were clutching and wrenching at her sheets. Her eyes were closed, but her face was filled with fear. She was whispering “please” and “no” over and over in her sleep.
I put my hands on her shoulders and said, “Anne?” Her eyes flew open and she screamed. She tried to throw herself out of bed, but I held on tight as she struggled. “Anne! It’s me. It’s Abe. You’re okay. It was just a nightmare.”
“Abe?” She sagged, suddenly limp. “Can you turn on the light? Please?” After I did, she searched my face, squinting in the sudden light, and then threw her arms around me. She held on tight, forcing me to sit down on her bed next to her. I held her in return. She trembled and cried silently.
I stroked her back and murmured the same familiar reassurances that we all do at times like this, knowing that the words didn’t matter. It was the act of compassion that was important. She let go and sniffed and wiped her eyes when she was done. “You need a tissue?”
She shook her head. “No, I used your shirt.” She barked out a little laugh.
“Bad dream?”
She nodded. “I’m fine, really. Just embarrassed. I haven’t had a nightmare since I was little. I’m sorry I woke you.”
“That’s okay, I read somewhere that we old people don’t sleep much anyway.”
“I wasn’t me, Abe. In the dream, I mean. I was getting ready for work and I was a waitress or something, because I could see myself in the mirror and I was wearing a uniform and an apron. I kept trying to put my makeup on, but I couldn’t because my hands were shaking too much. I remembered trying to hurry and at the same time not wanting to leave the bathroom because it was the only place I was left alone. But I couldn’t stay too long or he would come in to get me.”
“Who?”
“I don’t know, the man. So I gave up on the makeup and just washed my face. I looked terrible. There were black circles under my eyes, and my head hurt from not sleeping and from being scared all the time. It seemed like I had been scared forever. I came out of the bathroom, and he was standing in the hall like usual, waiting to take me to work.
“He had to drive me, because I wasn’t allowed to have the keys any more. I wasn’t allowed to be alone and I wasn’t allowed to drive. He made me cook, but all the knives were gone, except for the one he carried. He cut anything that needed to be cut. We went out to the car and started driving, and that’s when you woke me up.”
“Well, it’s over now. The things you’ve been through in the last couple of days? I’m surprised you only had a nightmare. Anybody else would have lost it by now. You’re a tough nut.”
“It was so weird. It didn’t feel like any dream I’ve ever had. I don’t know how to describe how real it was. I know everyone has dreams that seem real at the time, but this was way beyond that. Oh, and one other thing. The man in the dream, his skin was never still, like there were tiny wires moving underneath it all the time. He was a bag.”
“It doesn’t surprise me. If anything was going to give me bad dreams, it would be them.”
“Did my grandfather ever have dreams like this? Maybe this is part of that thing that we have.”
“Not that I know of. He knew when something was close, and he could get a fix on it, but that’s all.”
“Maybe he just didn’t tell you.”
I shrugged. “I guess. But I slept ten feet away from him for almost a year, and as far as I know he slept like a baby the whole time. Besides, we would tell each other anything that crossed our minds when we marched. Most days were long and boring, especially in the beginning. We talked about dreams, plans, made-up stories, you name it. He never made a secret of his gift, so I don’t know why he would hide something like this. Why, do you think this is more than a dream?”
“I don’t know. It sure felt real.”
“Well, at this point, I don’t think we can rule anything out. You ready to go back to sleep?”
“No, but I can try.” I snapped off the light and started to get up, but she pulled me back down. “Stay. Please.”
“Sure.” I swung my legs into the bed and propped myself up against the headboard. She lay down next to me, and after a few minutes, I heard her breathing even out as she fell asleep. I put one arm around her and waited for the dawn, content.