The weekend was strained between them. Laura spoke to him, but only when absolutely necessary. Several times Jack was on the verge of pleading with her to be reasonable, but somehow couldn't bring himself to do it.
Laura did not pack for him, as she usually did when he went on a business trip. She didn't offer to drive him to the airport, or even say goodbye when he left late Sunday afternoon.
She was certain that he knew that this was a true crisis in their marriage, but it was obvious he had no intention of dealing with it until his return. That was fine with Laura. She wanted time to think everything out herself.
Early Monday morning at the facility, Laura received a blow. Joey Lind had been placed in a foster home! His new foster parents were coming to pick him up at ten o'clock. Laura managed to have only ten minutes alone with the boy before he left. He was as crushed as she was, but he accepted the situation.
"One thing, Joey," Laura said, fighting back tears, "the… well, the things we did together – you must never tell anyone…"
"I know," the boy said softly.
"And you mustn't… well, don't expect the same things from your new foster mother."
"I'm going to miss you terribly, Laura," Joey said.
"I know, dear, and I'm going to miss you," Laura said, now regaining control of herself. "This had to happen sooner or later, I suppose. And you have your whole life in front of you, Joey. I want you to study and make something out of yourself. You're a fine young man and you can have a great future…"
The sound of Carl Mersh's footsteps coming down the hall brought their conversation to an end and they pressed hands in a final farewell.
Laura's heart wasn't in it when she rounded up the three young boys and an eleven-year-old girl to take home for a scheduled swimming class. Joey's placement had depressed her terribly. She had been counting on exciting hours with Joey to help take her mind off of her own problems.
By the time she had the children in her car, Laura knew that she would have her hands full today. Her class was made up of ten-year-old Donnie Mason, who was now off report and still sullen, Pete Carlson, a twelve-year-old boy who had just arrived at the facility, eleven-year-old Cindy Murphy, a red-haired pixie with a round, butterball figure who giggled constantly, and Matt Harper.
Matt Harper was eleven years old and as black as the ace of spades. Laura had never worked with black children before, but Carl Mersh asked her to include Matt in at least one of her home sessions. Matt had been placed in a black foster home a month ago and returned to the facility last week.
McGrudder explained to Laura that the child had a white fixation. He did not like other blacks and would not associate with them if he could avoid it. When asked why he wanted to associate with whites and even be placed in a white home, Matt responded, "Because that's where it's at! The whites have it all locked up."
The director asked Laura to observe Matt with the white children and in her white home and report back if she felt a placement in a white home might work.
When they arrived at Laura's house, the children were well behaved. Donnie Mason seemed to lose some of his sullenness, but remained a little withdrawn from the group. Laura decided he was basically a shy, reserved boy. He was of average height for his age and wore glasses. His face was covered with freckles and his body was round and pleasingly plump. Donnie seemed to get along well with Matt and Pete, but he made it plain that he didn't care much for Cindy Murphy.
Laura felt sorry for Cindy. The young girl was so round and plump she had all of the sex appeal of a beach ball. Her hair was straggly and her teeth were crooked. Cindy was obviously in that awkward, pre-puberty stage that all young girls suffer through. She had a high, somewhat shrill voice and her incessant giggling grated on everybody's nerves.
Cindy was also quite obviously interested in boys and desperate because they wouldn't have anything to do with her.
Pete Carlson was so average he made Laura smile. He was short and stocky, but very solid. His face was pleasant and he wore an open expression that was inviting.
Matt Harper surprised Laura. If she hadn't known that he was eleven, she would have guessed him to be fourteen or fifteen. He was tall and lanky, yet his every movement was graceful. His skin was the color of polished ebony and his pink lips and sparkling white teeth gleamed like beacons on his face. The whites of his eyes were like two flashlights blinking in an indigo night and his black, kinky hair was like a short mop pasted on his head.
Laura noted immediately that Matt was quiet and unassuming in her home. She saw him watching the other children carefully, as if he was studying what they did so that he wouldn't make a mistake. Even though he said very little in the living room, he gave Laura the impression of one being very eager to please.
After they had relaxed in the living room and chatted for a while, Laura told the children to change into their swim suits. She chose a conservative, one-piece suit for herself and changed in the bedroom.
The swimming class was a frantic session for Laura. Peter Carlson swore that he knew how to swim and promptly almost drowned. Donnie Mason tried to hide a deadly fear of water and became a brick the moment he was immersed. Cindy Murphy was a near disaster. She had absolutely no fear of the water, but her ability to learn anything Laura tried to show her was nil. The plump young girl also displayed an amazing lack of common sense. She continually jumped into water that was above her head and thrashed about until Laura would rescue her.
Mitt Harper was the most cooperative and the most eager to please, but it was obvious the black child was afraid of the water. He learned to float only after Laura supported him with her hand against his back for over fifteen minutes.
Laura fixed hot dogs for lunch and when she sat down with the children to eat she realized she was exhausted! The muscles in her body spasmed and ached.
Politely, the other children limited themselves to two hot dogs each, but Cindy Murphy had no reluctance to ask for a third. No wonder the child was so plump!
Laura could see that Matt was still hungry and she insisted that he have a third hot dog with Cindy.
"It's polite to keep her company, Matt," she chuckled, "unless you just can't eat any more at all."
"Yes, ma'am," Matt said politely as he joined Cindy on the trip to the kitchen.
Laura smiled to herself when the boy came back with another hot dog and his plate was heaped high with potato chips.
After lunch Laura took the children through the house, making helpful suggestions about living in other people's homes. It was interesting to watch the children and their reactions. Cindy Murphy might as well have been in another world for all of the attention she paid to what Laura said. Cindy actually brought up the end of the procession, making no attempt to even appear interested.
Donnie Mason seemed to withdraw into his sullen attitude again. Peter Carlson, on the other hand, exhibited an interest in much of what Laura told them and even asked some pointed questions several times.
Matt Harper remained close to Laura during the whole tour, listening to every word she said and asking what seemed like endless questions. His questions, Laura realized, were not designed to impress her. The boy really wanted to know.
She was patient with the black child and answered his every question as well as she could. There was even an intensity in his desire to learn how to please his next foster parents.
As she drove the children back to the facility, Laura couldn't remember being so physically tired. They had truly worn her out.
She was about to leave for the day and go home to rest when Carl Mersh stopped her in the corridor.
"Well, how did you get along with Matt Harper today?" the director asked.
"He seems like a very nice boy, Carl," Laura replied with a smile. "He gets along with the other children well and seems eager to please."
"How do you think he'd adjust in a white home, Laura?" Carl asked.
"I honestly don't know."
"Some years ago we placed black children in white homes," Carl explained. "And in other parts of the country they do it today. Of course, we're a private agency, so we don't have Federal or State pressure on us."
"Even in the case of children who are wards of the state?" Laura asked.
"Not even in those cases," Carl replied with a smile. "We work with the state under contract and as long as we continue to work within their standards they leave us alone. Matt is a special case. He's got it in his head that he wants to be with whites. Matt's background is humble. He grew up in a ghetto in Oakland and his father and mother died last year in a fire. They found him hiding in an old condemned building and suffering from malnutrition."
"That's terrible!" Laura remarked.
"And Matt is determined never to go back, I suppose," Mersh sighed. "McGrudder thinks that it's a toss up whether Matt could adjust to a wasp home. That's why I wanted your opinion, Laura."
"That's not fair, Carl," Laura said. "I've only observed the boy within a group for a few hours. And I had my hands full today, believe me!"
"You say he seemed eager to please?"
"I thought so," Laura replied. "He was attentive and tried to learn."
"How about doing me a favor?" Mersh said.
"Name it."
"How about spending some time alone with Matt and see what you think? We're low right now anyway and you shouldn't be overloaded. Normally, I wouldn't be this concerned, but I want to do what's right for the child."
"I understand," Laura replied. "But aren't you asking me to operate in the area of a psychologist? I'm not qualified for that, Carl."
"We'll leave the psychology to McGrudder," Carl laughed. "What I want is a down-home, honest opinion, Laura, and no psychologist can give me that hi less than a thirty-page report. I'll take whatever you tell me as just an unqualified opinion – okay?"
"Okay," Laura laughed.