"You know, Andrew,” Tiffany giggled as she rubbed his cum into her skin, “we have a whole wing on the right side of the house that we don't even use. Perhaps Eric would be interested in moving in."
I chuckled.
"That, my dear,” I summarized, “would be up to Eric, but I think it is a perfectly wonderful idea."
We both looked at the young man and he grinned. I had a feeling we were about to take in a boarder.
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POLICE STORY: THE SPEEDER
I had been a cop for twenty of my forty years, and I thought I had heard just about every excuse there was for speeding. One gentleman was in a hurry to get home because Monday night football was starting; one lady thought she left something baking in the oven; and one young man even said the speedometer in his brand new Corvette was broken and he didn't know how fast he was going. His ticket cost the most of any I had given out.
But the one that really floored me was the time I pulled a lady over for doing 67 miles per hour in a 40 miles per hour road construction area, although luckily the workers were at lunch. As I walked up to the driver's side of her sports car, she rolled the window down and smiled at me.
"Ma'am, do you know how fast you were going?” I asked.
"Yes, officer,” she replied, “I was doing a little over sixty five."
Her honesty surprised me. Most of them tried to play dumb and say they didn't realize how fast they were going. I cleared my throat.
"May I see your license and registration, please?"
"Certainly."
She took her driver's license from her wallet and handed it to me, then leaned over to the glove compartment for the registration. As she leaned, I couldn't help but notice she was wearing a very short skirt that barely concealed her bottom. I tried to look away, but found it almost impossible.
As she handed me the registration, she smiled again. She was pretty, not God's gift to men by any means, but still pretty, with shoulder length brown hair and twinkling blue eyes, and probably a few years younger than myself, with a devilish grin that was almost contagious.
"This is the first car I've ever bought on my own,” she announced proudly. “My ex would never allow me to get a sports car, so I'm pretty tickled about it. I'm pretty tickled about him being my ex too,” she added with a giggle.
"Being proud of your new car is a good thing,” I said, and then paused to look at her license for her name, “Ms. Kent, but speeding is not a good way to show it off. Is there a reason why you were going so fast?"
I waited. I expected one of the usual excuses, when all of a sudden, she dumbfounded me with a new one.
"Yes, officer,” she said, still grinning, “I was horny."
I stood silent a moment, letting her words sink in.
"Ex … excuse me?"
"You heard me,” she paused and looked at my name tag, “Officer Robbins, I was horny and I wanted to get home so I could use my new dildo."
She reached into the tiny back seat and pulled out a plastic shopping bag, then reached in the bag and pulled out an adult toy. I stood there speechless for a few seconds, just looking at the imitation penis.
"It looks like the real thing, doesn't it?” she asked.
"Y … yes, it's quite realistic,” I fumbled my words.
"I thought so too,” she replied, “so I bought it, and now I'm in a hurry to try it out."
I swallowed what felt like a brick in my throat and took out my pad and pen.
"Well, I'm afraid I'm still going to have to give you a ticket for speeding, although I won't put down that it was in a road construction zone. The cost of the ticket would triple if the workers were here."
"I appreciate it, Officer Robbins,” she said calmly, “you do what you have to do."
As I went around to the back of the car to write down the license plate number, I could see through the back glass that she was unwrapping the plastic off of her new toy. I took a deep breath, focused on the paper, and kept writing.
I went back to the driver's side door with full intentions of scolding her for speeding, but as I looked down, I saw that she had raised her skirt, lowered her panties to mid thigh, and was rubbing the head of the dildo against her pussy. She was totally oblivious to me, had leaned the seat back a bit, and was truly enjoying herself. I could feel my own penis beginning to harden. I finally found my voice.
"Young lady,” I told her, “that is totally inexcusable behavior."
She looked up and grinned.
"Why? Are you gay?"
I couldn't help but smile.
"No, of course I'm not gay."
"Then I don't see why this is inexcusable behavior,” she replied, still rubbing the toy against her female.
"I'm trying to make a point here,” I told her.
"You made your point,” she countered, and then moaned as the head of the dildo slid between her lips, “now give me the damn ticket so I can get home and play with my new toy."
I could see her wetness on the plastic playmate as she moved it in and out, and when I didn't give her the speeding ticket right away, she unfastened a couple of the buttons on her blouse and began to caress her breasts. My dick was getting so hard that it felt as if someone had shoved one of those orange traffic cones in my pants.
"Young lady,” I scolded, “I cannot condone this kind of behavior."
She looked up at me and smiled.
"Then turn your head."
I could see her erect nipples between her fingers and they looked like hard, pink pencil erasers.
"You cannot do this in public,” I reprimanded.
"I'm not in public,” she calmly replied, “I'm in the privacy of my own car. You, on the other hand, are the one standing out there for everyone to see with a hard-on the size of a baseball bat. If anyone is being obscene, it's you."
I had had enough of her smart mouth as well as her indecent behavior.
"That's it,” I told her, opening her car door and pointing to my own vehicle, “Go get in the back seat of my car right now."
She looked a little shocked.